Mumbo Jumbo or Can You Really Control Your Life’s Path

For about the last 15 years of my life, I have been exposed to numerous situations either in attending seminars or by watching documentaries where individuals have tried to emphasise the importance of positive thinking and having the right mental attitude. Until very recently, I was the world’s biggest skeptic and very much dismissed the idea that if you thought about achieving something then you could actually turn these thoughts into reality. I continued with this blinkered mentality until someone said to me

“Don’t criticise or ridicule anything until you know more about it or you have tried it for yourself” (This advice is good advice and can be used in any scenario that you come across on a day to day basis).

However, with these words still ringing in my ears, I was attending a property investing conference in London along with my eldest daughter Julie. Over dinner one evening, the topic of “the power of thought” came up. Everyone within our group expressed their thoughts on the subject (some more strongly than others). Again fighting hard to put my skeptisisms to one side, I decided to take part in an exercise suggested by another member of the party. My daughter Julie was asked if she could have the choice of any luxury sports car what would it be and in what colour would she like it. Immediately, she suggested a Red Ferrari . That was it. We had to see a red Ferrari before we left London which was only twelve hours later.
The next morning arrived and we set off by underground to King’s Cross railway station to catch the 10.00 am train to Scotland. We only had about 15 minutes before we had to catch our train and we decided to wait outside at the side of the road. With only seconds left before we had to make our way to the platform, guess what stopped at the traffic lights. Yes, a bright, brand spanking new Red Ferrari. Now was this coincidence or what. Spurned on by this experience I started to try this out with other things and lo and behold they were met with similar results.

Armed with new found enthusiasm, I then decided to investigate the subject further. I read every book I could find on the subject, I surfed the net for as much information as I could. I checked out Neuro Linguistic Programming, Hypnotism and much much more.

It is now quite clear in my own mind that olympic athletes, professional sportsmen, successful businessmen and the like would not have achieved this exceptionally high level of success without the right frame of mind and dreams of reaching the ultimate goal.


If you would like to find out more visit http://www.CorrectMindFrame.com

Thank You Very Much – Turning Problems Into Gifts

I am a martial artist and black belt in aikido, a practice that continues to teach me about life, both on and off the mat. For example, at the end of each aikido practice, I express gratitude to my partners by bowing and saying: "Thank you very much." I've found over the years that sometimes I have obvious reasons to say thank you - working with that person was exhilarating and fun. However, sometimes the reasons are not so obvious - my partner was stiff, rough, unconscious, or generally difficult to work with.

Still, I say thank you, because we're supposed to. Over the years, because I like to be congruent, I have learned to look for something to be grateful for. With my stiff partner, I find I have learned to be more flexible. With the rough opponent, I learned to take care of myself by speaking up or falling more carefully. In each case, I look for the gift. It's become fun to do this, and fun to apply this learning off the mat as well.

How might you incorporate this simple but effective practice in your daily life? Who are your attackers, and where are the unexpected gifts? After an encounter with the pokey driver ahead, if you had to say, "Thank you very much," what would you see as the gift? With a dismissive coworker or boss, if you had to look for the gift, what would it be? In each "difficult" relationship, where's the gift?

There are certain times of the year when we are more aware of being grateful for all of our blessings. My hope is that you might be grateful all year round, and not only for the obvious gifts but for the unexpected ones as well. Wishing you many of both kinds . . .

Developing An Optimistic Attitude

How's your attitude lately? I caught myself doing something surprising a few days ago: being a pessimist!

I was working on a big project and making great progress, when suddenly I encountered a big obstacle that would take more time and energy to get through than I had anticipated. The first words out of my mouth were, "Of course, everything always goes wrong for me." Gasp! Who said that?

I tend to think of myself as a positive person most of the time. I almost always have a smile or laugh available, and I try to look on the bright side of things. But I wasn't always like that. I spent most of my early life stuck in negative thinking. For the past few years I've worked very hard on changing my mindset to a positive one, and helping others to do the same. The other day I realized just how easy it is to slip back into negative thinking again.

To be fair to myself, I was frustrated when I uttered that negative phrase. It's understandable that we get upset when things go wrong. However, what I said simply isn't true. Everything always goes wrong for me. At that moment, all of the hard work I've done on myself over the past few years vanished. I was right back where I used to spend most of my time: being a "victim."

I like to joke that I own lakefront property in "Victimville." ;-) But I don't have to stay there. None of us do.


Expecting the Best
You've probably heard the phrase, "Expect the Best, but Prepare for the Worst." Do you really expect the best? Or are you just waiting for something negative to happen so you can say, "Everything always goes wrong for me." Isn't preparing for the worst the same as expecting the worst?

We can't expect the best AND the worst. We have to choose. In my moment of frustration, I was expecting the worst. Once I realized what I was doing, I decided to change it around. One obstacle does not mean my whole project is ruined. It just means I might have to work a little harder, or a little longer to reach my goal. What's the big deal? At that moment, the big deal was that I wouldn't achieve the outcome I was expecting, in the timeframe I expected to do it. Ah, notice the word "expect" sprinkled throughout that statement. How often do our expectations get us into trouble? For most of us, quite often!

So I uttered a phrase that would cancel out my previous negative one: It's all good. Whether I meet my goals or not, it's all good. Even if more obstacles come up, it's still all good. Everything happens exactly when it's meant to. That phrase has the power to relieve all pressure and stress, if we allow it to.


Reinforcing Postive Thoughts
The truth is, positive thinking takes consistent effort. It would be great if we could "fix" our negative thinking once and for all, and never have to worry about it again. Unfortunately, it doesn't work that way. We have the tendency to form habits around our most common routines, whether physical or mental. In order to change negative thinking into positive thinking, we need to work at it constantly.

There are two ways to do this:

Replace the negative thoughts with positive ones - It takes practice, but you can actually catch yourself thinking negative thoughts. Begin to form an awareness of when this happens. Because I've been working at this for so long, I immediately noticed when I uttered that negative phrase. If you are new to positive thinking, it might take some time for you to notice when negative thoughts come barging in. When you do notice them, immediately question the thought. Is it really true? Does it accurately reflect your reality? Even if it does, you can still choose something else. What reality would you like to create? Then form a positive statement that will cancel out the negative one. Every time you come across a negative thought, go through this same inner process. Question the negative thought and then replace it with a positive one.

Preventative maintenance - You don't have to wait for negative thoughts to come up in order to start thinking more positively. Make it a habit to purposely feed your mind positive thoughts each day -- several times a day. Keep it simple. Say things like, "I am a good person." -- "I love my life." -- "I'm good at what I do." -- "I make my own good luck." -- "I choose to be happy." -- and my personal favorite, "It's all good."

At first you might not really believe these positive thoughts, and that's okay. Keep at it. Say them as if you really did mean them, and eventually you will begin to believe it. Remember that our negative thinking patterns are a result of YEARS of reinforcement. Changing negative thinking patterns to positive ones takes time.

I'm in this journey with you, you are not alone. Remember that it IS a journey. We don't have to rush to the finish line, we just need to enjoy the scenery. It's all good -- really! :-)

Change Up! - Attitude Is Everything

"Believe that life is worth living and your belief will help create the fact." - William James

Attitude is everything. I know that you've heard this before and either agreed or disagreed. Either way, you were confirming its truth. Attitude is a filter for everything going into your mind and everything coming out of your mind. Right now, I have no idea what you are thinking because your attitude is unique to you.

It's not a matter of having a bad or good attitude. Everyone's attitude is influenced by so many thoughts at one time that it is almost inevitable that your attitude is always a mixture of positive and negative words and images. While most people speak at 150 to 200 words per minute, research suggests that we think at about 1,300 words per minute. Additionally, many of our thoughts are images, which could encompass thousands of words at once.

Like Herding Cats. I know this seems a bit overwhelming at the moment, but if you stick with me, it will become clear. As with most complex issues, there are many causes and variations within the issues. There can literally be thousands of permutations with any issue. However, as Dr. Phil said on a recent show, "while the problems are complex, the solutions are simple".

Don't Yell at the Computer. What I'm about to write may shock you, but here goes. There are really only three emotions: love, anger, and fear. Love draws you toward something, anger pits you against something, and fear chases you away from something. All of your feelings are a combination of these three emotions. Whether you're happy, sad, worried, anxious, depressed, afraid, or content, these feelings all stem from these emotions.

This is good news. If we can understand what's driving our thoughts, then we can change them. When you make a decision, you can trace that decision back to your thoughts at the time you were deciding. Even though you may not be aware, you are always talking to yourself. Some of you just said to yourself, "no I'm not".

The way to change your behavior is to change your attitude. To change your attitude, you must separate the stimulus from the response. Unlike animals, humans have the ability to choose their response to any situation. There is a space, even though it can be milliseconds at times, that we may choose how to react in every situation. Many people allow their subconscious to make these decisions, which is why they feel so out of control. We can take back control.

"The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life.

Attitude, to me is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company ...a church ...a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice everyday regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past ...we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way.

We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude ...I am convinced that life is 10hat happens to me and 90ow I react to it. And so it is with you ...we are in charge of our attitudes." - Charles Swindoll

Attitude of Gratitude

An attitude of gratitude? People often to think it will come from having some great luck or fortune. Of course it could feel great to win the lottery, and great friends, money, houses, travel - these are all good things, but not enough by themselves. The right frame of mind is necessary to fully enjoy life. You need the attitude of gratitude.

Gratitude 101

Your life is better when you feel blessed, when you can look around and say "Thank you, God," or "Thank you universe." Whether or not you are religious, when you see life as a wonderful gift, your experience is a richer one. Imagine going through life like you're a child, and every morning is Christmas.

Of course, it is easy to think that gratitude comes from having what we want. We might imagine ourselves giving thanks if we had money, a loving family, and maybe a house on the beach. But we know there are ungrateful, unhappy people with these things. We also know that there are poor people full of gratitude for what little they have, so where does this feeling come from?

Creating Gratitude

An attitude of gratitude arises from how you look at things. It is the natural feeling that comes when you recognize the real value of the people and things in your life. Focus on the good and you cannot help but have a better attitude and experience of life. Gratitude, then, is something you can encourage, something you can learn.

The first step is to stop and smell the roses. How can you be thankful for something you don't notice or enjoy? By the way, roses really do smell great.

The second step is to make this appreciative approach to roses and life a habit. You don't need to ignore the ugliness in the world. Just consciously choose to see the good and beautiful things, until doing so becomes automatic.

One way to encourage this habit is to start writing down every positive thing that happens to you, and all the things you like. Continue this until you start automatically seeing the good things in life. If you've ever bought a white car, and started seeing white cars all over, you know how awareness and focus can alter your perception of reality. In the same way, once you are aware of the good, and start looking for it, you'll start to see wonderful things all over.

Simple exercises like the one above train your mind with time. When you are in the habit of "counting your blessings," gratitude, and a much richer experience of life is the natural result. You will have an attitude of gratitude.

Are You Doing What You Love?

Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful. --Albert Schweitzer (1875 - 1965)

We are busier than we have ever been, working long hours and feeling under more and more pressure. How do you spend your days? For many people work and pleasure are seen as separate, with work being a chore that has to be done to pay the bills. It doesn’t always have to be like that. Although we don’t have to love everything we do, we do need to gain some enjoyment from most of what we do. Take a moment to see if it is time to start afresh and do something you love, something that adds the pleasure factor back into your working life?

Think about what matters to you and why you do the things you do. For each person that means something different. What aspects of a job are important to you? List them. Think about your dream job. Does it motivate and inspire you? If not, think again. It has to mean something to you; otherwise you will not be prepared to put in the effort to achieve what you want. Ask: ‘What am I prepared to give up to make this happen?’ ‘What would I love to try?’ ‘What options do I have?’ ‘What are my talents, skills and qualities?’ ‘How can I utilise them in my ideal job?’ How can you take an idea and turn it into reality? Get creative and think through how you could make money doing what you enjoy.

Starting anew requires courage, confidence and commitment. Hold on to your sense of purpose. Believe in yourself. Ignore the critics, for there are bound to be some, and face your fears (there will many of those too!). Ask for help from those people who can assist you and get supporters to keep you motivated. Research things that interest you and, if necessary, go back to basics and learn new skills. Develop a clear vision of where you’d like to be in 10 years’ time – and why. Write it down. Be specific. This will provide you with something to focus on. Think creatively. This may not happen all of a sudden, but if you work at it gradually, day by day, it can happen.

And if starting something new is not for you, how can you love the job you already have? You can’t always control your situation, but you can always choose how you react to it. Your attitude colours how you face every day and has an influence on the people around you. Choose to be positive. Are there areas of your job that you can improve on? Who can you discuss this with? Is a change to a new role in the same company an option? Examine the possibilities. Your job does not define you, but how you do it does.

And why bother? Doing what you love gives you a good reason to get up every morning. Your life will be challenging, certainly, exciting, definitely. Doing things you enjoy which give you personal fulfilment and satisfaction has been shown to contribute to good health and longevity. Don’t wait for perfect circumstances to start. Begin now!

100% Attitude

The effect your attitude has on everything – some steps to improve it.

Your attitude will determine a lot, we’ve all heard the glass half full or glass half empty way off looking at things, both are the same thing, but are vastly different as well.  You have the ability to transform your life and reach new heights of success and fulfilment. Whether at this moment in time your attitude is positive, negative or somewhere in the middle you can take control of your life and set yourself free!  Everyone has potential, the unfortunate thing is that most people go through life and never realise or take advantage of this!

Firstly you must visualize what you want - you the dreams everyone has – unfortunately most people leave them as just that, dreams.  The second thing that you must do is see yourself in your dream environment, and see yourself getting there.  I can, I will and when I are the things you must say rather than the negative version I can’t, I won’t and if I!  Don’t worry if you fall into a more negative category – the good thing about attitude is that you can learn and train yourself to have a positive one given a bit of time and practice.

You’ve told yourself that it is going to happen and now must talk about it by doing this you are making yourself accountable and putting yourself under a little pressure to make it happen!  If you dream is to be on Millionaire Street and you are currently in debt – you must realise that this dream is not going to happen overnight in may take a few years – you don’t go around saying you are going to be a millionaire by next Thursday afternoon in three weeks time!  Don’t set unrealistic targets otherwise you may put yourself under undue stress and pressure to achieve, which can be detrimental to your cause.

Attitude isn’t everything – it is simply the first thing!  Remember it’s going to be action that actually gets you there and the attitude will determine what pace that will be.  You are the architect, the builder and the benefactor of all your life’s endeavours.  So when something doesn’t go your way the first place to look is inwards.  You must ask yourself what you could have done differently to have gotten a more favourable result, after this inward analysis is done then you look at some of the external issues that may have been amiss too.

Everyone has their fears; I don’t mean things like scared of the dark or spiders etc.  I am talking about fears to do with success, for example, it might be something that you haven’t learnt to do yet, and you fear that you may fail.  Remember that if you don’t try you fail anyway, and if you do fail sometimes then success is that much sweeter because you actually had to get over obstacles to get to the end result.

In summary we’ll use something interesting to illustrate a point.  There are 26 letters in the alphabet, A = 1 and Z = 26 working on that basis we assign a number to each letter of the word attitude and add them up:
A(1) + T(20) + T(20) + I(9) + T(20) + U(21) + D(4) + E(5) = 100 - 100% Attitude!
Having a positive or optimistic attitude helps you to achieve more for yourself than a negative or pessimistic one.  Visualise what you want, take action to make it happen, overcome any fears and keep plugging away, remember that tree that you see in your local park didn’t get that big overnight.  You can learn to train your mind, and over time you will learn how to develop and maintain a positive attitude.