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Sabtu, 30 April 2011

Four Laws Of The Mind Essential For Effective Self Hypnosis

To make your self hypnosis effective you need to be aware of certain principles. If you are not aware of the following laws of the mind then you may end up creating the opposite of what you desire with your self hypnosis practice.

1. Every thought affects the body as well.

In other words, although the mind and the body are understood to be separate in practice it doesn’t work that way. Mental stress can create knots in your back or even give you ulcers. Therefore, Be aware of your thinking. If you are negative all the time to yourself or about your surroundings it is the same as negative self hypnosis.

2. What you expect tends to be realized.

If you wake up telling yourself you will have a bad day you probably will. In other words your expectations drive your results. Negative expectations is the same as negative self hypnosis.

3. Imagination is stronger than knowledge.

You ‘know’ that ghosts and monsters do not exist. Yet hearing ghost stories at night will create fear. Especially if sitting around a campfire in a forest. There is no contest. Imagination will always win. Another point for the importance of positive thoughts and visualizations in your practice of self hypnosis.

4. What you resist the most stays with you.

Have you ever had to stop doing something and found that its more difficult than you realized? Maybe you have had occasion to go on a diet and suddenly foods that you couldn’t have cared less about start looking very appetizing? Maybe there was/is someone who irritates you and you know there is no reason to. So you try to keep the irritation away but it gets to you even more?

I could go on and on with examples. Basically, when you resist something it tends to stick. This happens because when you resist you have to think of the very thing you are trying to resist, so it’s continuously on your mind.

It’s as if someone told you that they would give you a $1000 if you don’t think of a pink elephant all day. I’m sure you don’t spend your time thinking of something as random as a pink elephant. However, trying to resist that image of a pink elephant with a $1000 on the line would be impossible.

In other words, what you resist tends to stay with you. Which means that in focusing on an affirmation for self hypnosis you have to phrase the affirmation in the positive. I.e. affirm what you want to achieve and NOT on what you don’t want.

Follow these four laws of the mind and your day to day thoughts will be more guided in a positive direction. Of course, your thoughts create your internal emotional states which is the same as self hypnosis. So you have to be aware of your thoughts to create the state of being that you desire.

Abbas Abedi
Get More Information At My Blog Self Hypnosis

Jumat, 29 April 2011

Taking Yourself Too Seriously? - Suggestions for Reclaiming Your Perspective

"We can change our circumstances by a mere change of our attitude." - William James, 19th Century American psychologist and philosopher

I've noticed I often take myself, my work, and my life way too seriously. I blow events out of proportion, demand perfection, and generally behave as if my needs are at the center of everything.

I agonize over small decisions, worry about personal interactions, wrestle with each word of a simple e-mail, and wake up at night with my heart pounding in anticipation of tomorrow's presentation or with angst about what happened today. Was I good enough? How can I get this right for a change? Why did I say THAT?! The minutest detail is not too small to escape scrutiny when I'm in this frame of mind - when life becomes very, very serious.

When this happens I lose my self, my center, and my perspective. I step out of the precious present moment and into anxiety about the future or the past. I forget that there's nothing I can control except right now, right here, this moment and my availability to it.

Happily, remembering this personal truth is what shifts me back into the present. I begin to breathe again and slip seamlessly into the realization that right now, at this moment, I am okay. Sanity returns as I focus on what is at hand.

Vibrant and Joyful
I practice a martial art called aikido, whose flowing and graceful movements belie the power behind them. Aikido is based on principles such as centered response and utilization of energy, and it has practical applications in the world of conflict resolution and self-management. Morihei Ueshiba, the founder of aikido, called it the Art of Peace, and said that we must "always practice the Art of Peace in a vibrant and joyful manner." Aikidoists try to remember this as we throw each other around the mat, smiling and having fun while we work to perfect our technique.

As we push on into the first decade of this new century, it is likely that life will become even more complex than it already is. Here are some suggestions that might help when you become separated from your perspective:

- Acknowledge - Often all it takes to change your current stressed out state is to notice it. As you bring your awareness back to the present moment, you regain a sense of perspective and possibility.
- Center - Breathe. Smile. Be.
-Call someone and talk about it, better yet laugh about it.
- Read a poem.
- Listen to music.
- Take a walk or go for a run.
- Dream up some practices of your own.

Use your growing awareness to lighten up, smile, live and love in a vibrant and joyful manner. And stop taking yourself so seriously!

Kamis, 28 April 2011

Secrets Of Good Luck

Good luck seems like random fortunate coincidences, but there are things we do that cause more of what we call "luck," both good and bad. Usually, we don't know we are doing these things, but what if we did? Could we then create luck?

Yes. Actually, there are at least seven specific techniques you can use to generate more good luck. This article is about just one of those techniques, one of the easiest ones. It is simply choosing to recognize the luck you already have, until your mind is trained to do this automatically.

Recognize Good Luck

Once, when I bought a particular car, I suddenly began to see the same model all over. The other cars had always been there, of course, but now I was noticing them, because my mind was "tuned into" that model. Perhaps you've had a similar experience. This is how our brains work. We see more of whatever we are looking for or "tuned into", and this is true with luck too. Just look for it, and you'll see more of it.

Why does "seeing" your luck matter? For two important reasons. The first is that you'll feel better when you start noticing the ways in which you are lucky. Counting your "blessings" brings a sense of gratitude that is good for your soul, even if you're not religious. The psychology of this process is real regardless, so this is a brain training exercise for a better life.

The second reason is that when you start recognizing the luck you have, and watching for more, you'll notice that you "get lucky" more often. It won't be your imagination. Yes, you will actually have more good luck, and there is a logical explanation for this.

Create Good Luck

People may tell you that God or the universe blesses you when you have gratitude in your heart. This is a nice thought, but it's not my style. My more scientific explanation is that when you acknowledge luck, and habitually look for more, you create a certain frame of mind. This frame of mind helps you take advantage of opportunities you might otherwise miss.

Here is a personal example: One day y brother mentioned that he's making money from simply hanging advertisements on his websites. Since I had no interest in the internet at the time, I might have just said "That's nice," and let it go at that. However, my mind is in the habit of looking for good luck, so I asked a few questions. A year and a half later, I'm making a good living writing about topics like this.

You have probably heard the saying; "If life gives you lemons, make lemonade." This perfectly describes the frame of mind of a lucky person. When you recognize how lucky you are, even in small ways, it makes the possibility of good luck more real to you. This, in turn, gets you watching, and the watching gets you thinking, "How can I make lemonade from these lemons? How is this lucky for me? Where is my good luck in this situation?"

Rabu, 27 April 2011

The Ghost Of Fear

To understand the ghost of fear, let me tell you a short parable:

Once upon a time, Jake and Fear were friends. Fear was Jake’s constant companion, and Fear helped him a lot. Fear saved him from lots of troubles and dangers, and helped him choose right paths and ways in his life.

Whenever Jake would carelessly go with the wrong company of “friends” or make a very careless decision, Fear would butt in and remind him of his father’s counsels and admonitions. When walking right in danger’s path, Fear would whisper a word of warning to dissuade him from proceeding.

Fear would also tell him the proper behavior when Jake was in front of the elderly and other people in authority. Fear would give him the ability to do and say only the respectful and kind words to people. Fear would also tell him to be polite and humble when there was a conflict with people he was related with. In short, Fear has been helping him to keep out of troubles and dangers. Fear was really a friend. Jake liked Fear’s company.

Then one day, Jake met Doubt. Doubt seemed very concerned and sincere about Jake. Doubt said his closeness to Fear was remarkable — but alarming. Doubt threw lies about Fear, distorting the truth that Jake knew about Fear. Worse, Doubt said Fear was actually taking him to a perilous direction, with Jake being unaware.

Jake asked Fear about the things Doubt told him. They had some discussions that somehow went a bit sour. They parted ways with some misunderstandings.

Then one day, Jake heard that Fear had suddenly died.

Doubt lost no time in scaring Jake about Fear. Doubt said that Fear’s premature death and his unsettled “dispute” with Jake might cause Fear to come back from the dead. Thus, the ghost of fear started to haunt Jake. He would remember the times when Fear accompanied him and warned him of bad things. But this time, he feared the voice of Fear.

The more Jake listened to Doubt, the worse he became afraid of Fear. Fear seemed to be no longer a friend, but a spooky entity that sought his destruction.

End of the parable.

The best way to “exorcize” or get rid of these “ghosts” of fear is to make fear somehow a friend again. You can use your fear to help you if you face the truth about it. Your negative imagination creates your ghosts. A crazy imagination is good if you use it to create a “friendly” ghost. This is what I recommend.

The book of Proverbs states: “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.”

Selasa, 26 April 2011

How to Plan the Perfect Spring Break Family Vacation

From time to time everyone needs some time away from their life. It does not matter if you are 10 years old and in 5th grade or 35 years old and working a full time job, to maintain good mental health you have to take the occasional vacation.

Some time around the beginning of April most public and private schools have Spring Break from School which is a great time to plan a vacation.

Most vacations when you have children become about them, and you wind up at places like Disney land or some other child orientated vacation spot, but what about you?

Las Vegas used to be known as an adult getaway where what happens there stays there. This is no longer the case. Over the past 15 years, Las Vegas realized that more money can be made from a family orientated city rater then just from gambling.

Many casinos started adding attractions for children like go carts and other amusements, and many other activities aimed at giving a child a good time, but the casinos also opened up day care centers, so parents can get some time to enjoy themselves as well.

I know when I would go to Disney World with my kids after the 2nd or 3rd day I was looking forward to getting back to work.

For the last several years we have been going to Las Vegas for our family Vacations over spring break and the kids enjoy it. They get to go on roller coasters, swim, play video games, watch movie the list really goes on and on for all the things they can do, and I get to spend a few hours ever day with my wife in the spa getting a message, eating in nice restaurants and playing some Blackjack in the casinos.

Since we started doing this I have seen my family grow closer. My wife noticed that I am in a better mood for the rest of the year after we get back from vacation. I am enjoying my job more and all in all life is just better.

Putting together a Los Vegas vacation is very simple to do. You can go to a travel agent, or do it yourself online. I have always preferred to go to a travel agent and just let them do it, but if you are trying to save money you can get some good deals online that a travel agent can't or won't offer you.

If you choose to do it yourself, it is easy to do. You can go to your computer and do a search for Las Vegas. You will see every casinos and hotel listed and you can go thru them one at a time and see what they offer for you and your family to do.

You will also see everything the city and surrounding areas have to offer, and there really are tons of fun things for everyone in Las Vegas.

I hope to see you and your family there.

Senin, 25 April 2011

Managing The Fear Of Loneliness

Sometime or another we will experience a time when we are alone. Some people fear of being alone for various reasons. The first step is to become comfortable with yourself and having the self-confidence that you will be able to manage being alone. There is nothing wrong with being alone. If being alone bothers you then seeing a counselor can help you with these issues.

In the meantime, here is a short list of techniques that a person can use so that the fear of being alone doesn’t become a major issue in their lives.

The first step is to find an activity that you enjoy and where you can meet a lot of people. For instance, joining a group activity such as a volleyball group, women’s club, or making crafts can be a great way to meet people. Doing something that you like to do will make you happy and will increase your chances of making friends.

Spending time with animals can be a great source of companionship. Whether you have a dog or you go to your local shelter, spending time with an animal or pet can help us to feel better. Animals can be of good company to all of us whether we are alone or not.

Helping others through community service can be of some help. There are many people out there who could benefit from your time and talents. Helping others can give you a source of pride and
accomplishment and also can lead to friendships.

It isn’t fun being alone, but sometimes there are worse things. For instance, imagine that you are married or stuck in a relationship that you can’t get out of and also makes you miserable. Not only do you have to live with this person, but there is no way to get out of the relationship because of various financial or personal reasons. As a result, you are stuck living with someone that you can’t stand and makes you depressed every single day of your life. With this viewpoint, being alone doesn’t sound that bad.

For those of you who believe in God, spending time with God and praying to him can help us in our lonely situation. Spending time with God and asking God for help in our time of loneliness can be of great comfort. You never know how God will work in ones life. Ask him for help and trust that he will help you.

As a Layman, the important thing is to do something constructive. Sitting around and doing nothing will not make things any better whether its dealing with the fear of being alone or something else. Take it one day at a time and stay committed in trying to solve your problem.

Minggu, 24 April 2011

Thoughts On Thinking

Thinking. What does thinking mean? It means reflecting upon and analyzing the different aspects of a situation or a condition or any issue. This needs time. How many of us think? Why should we think? What are the issues about which we should think? If you are a medical professional, do you need to think about politics? If you are a computer professional, do you need to think
about stars? If you are a housewife, do you need to think about the petroleum prices around the world?

Our thinking

What should be our areas of thinking? Do not many of us waste time by thinking about issues that don't touch their life at all? We are all given limited time during a day. We only have 24 hours and we have to manage time in such a way that we get maximum results that help us. Getting results in areas that don't help us, are of no use. Same applies to thinking. The
question- what should I think about needs an answer to - What are my priorities in my life. If this year, my priority is to get a promotion then I need to think about the ways I can get it. If this year, my child is getting into a college, my priority is to know more about college life and think of ways to make him more comfortable in the college and help him get better results. Everyday, we know about our priorities and we have to direct thinking towards that. For example, you may love thinking about astronomy. But if your spouse is in the hospital fighting a bad disease, your priority is to learn more about that disease and think of ways to make your spouse recover faster.

Breaking old patterns

Many of us have developed patterns of thinking and we don't get away from these patterns even when required. This is wrong. We have to think about what we should think. That is our first job. And to know about that, we have to have life goals, divide them in small time frames and achieve them one after another. Our thinking has to help us doing that.

What should we think about?

Thinking about issues that lead to a happier life for us and help us achieve our goals is the correct way of thinking and investing time in that. To invest time thinking about poverty in the world, if we are ourselves running short of money will not help anyone. But if we think about the ways we can make more money, that will help us surely.

Give some thoughts on where you should apply your thinking towards, and be successful in what you do.

Sabtu, 23 April 2011

Getting Help For Your Fear, Bipolar, And Anxiety Problems

It is not easy to deal with your fears, bipolar, or anxiety problems. The first step is that you should talk to a professional who can get you started in the right path of getting better. Getting help from a counselor or other professional is very important and can provide you much help and insights in dealing with your current problem. In addition, here are some techniques a person can use to help manage their fears, bipolar, and anxieties.

Learn to take it one day at a time. Instead of worrying about how you will get through the rest of the week or coming month, try to focus on today. Each day can provide us with different opportunities to learn new things and that includes learning how to deal with your problems. Focus on the present and stop trying to predict what may happen next week. Next week will take care of itself.

A good way to manage your fear is to challenge your negative thinking with positive statements and realistic thinking. When encountering thoughts that make your fearful or anxious, challenge those thoughts by asking yourself questions that will maintain objectivity and common sense.

Sometimes, we may be nervous doing a certain task that may be scary. When this happens, visualize yourself doing the task in your mind. For instance, you and your team have to play in the championship hockey game in front of a large group of people in the next few days. Before the big day comes, imagine yourself playing the game in your mind. Imagine that your playing in front of a large audience. By playing the game in your mind, you will be better prepared to perform for real when the time comes. Self Visualization is a great way to reduce the fear and stress of a coming situation.

Remember that there is one power that is stronger than your fears and that is the power of God. A person does not have to be religious to use the power of God. When the going gets tough, talk to God about your problems as if you were talking to a friend. Review the Bible and pray hard. Be persistent and be open in the avenues that God may provide to you in solving your problem. It is not always easy, however God is in control and he will help you if you ask him.

As a Layman, I realize it is not easy to deal with all of our fears, however there are all kinds of help available. The key is to be patient and not to give up. In time, you will be able to find those resources that will help you with your problems.

Jumat, 22 April 2011

Mumbo Jumbo or Can You Really Control Your Life’s Path

For about the last 15 years of my life, I have been exposed to numerous situations either in attending seminars or by watching documentaries where individuals have tried to emphasise the importance of positive thinking and having the right mental attitude. Until very recently, I was the world’s biggest skeptic and very much dismissed the idea that if you thought about achieving something then you could actually turn these thoughts into reality. I continued with this blinkered mentality until someone said to me

“Don’t criticise or ridicule anything until you know more about it or you have tried it for yourself” (This advice is good advice and can be used in any scenario that you come across on a day to day basis).

However, with these words still ringing in my ears, I was attending a property investing conference in London along with my eldest daughter Julie. Over dinner one evening, the topic of “the power of thought” came up. Everyone within our group expressed their thoughts on the subject (some more strongly than others). Again fighting hard to put my skeptisisms to one side, I decided to take part in an exercise suggested by another member of the party. My daughter Julie was asked if she could have the choice of any luxury sports car what would it be and in what colour would she like it. Immediately, she suggested a Red Ferrari . That was it. We had to see a red Ferrari before we left London which was only twelve hours later.
The next morning arrived and we set off by underground to King’s Cross railway station to catch the 10.00 am train to Scotland. We only had about 15 minutes before we had to catch our train and we decided to wait outside at the side of the road. With only seconds left before we had to make our way to the platform, guess what stopped at the traffic lights. Yes, a bright, brand spanking new Red Ferrari. Now was this coincidence or what. Spurned on by this experience I started to try this out with other things and lo and behold they were met with similar results.

Armed with new found enthusiasm, I then decided to investigate the subject further. I read every book I could find on the subject, I surfed the net for as much information as I could. I checked out Neuro Linguistic Programming, Hypnotism and much much more.

It is now quite clear in my own mind that olympic athletes, professional sportsmen, successful businessmen and the like would not have achieved this exceptionally high level of success without the right frame of mind and dreams of reaching the ultimate goal.


If you would like to find out more visit http://www.CorrectMindFrame.com

Kamis, 21 April 2011

Making A Life

Tom Paterson, in his book, “Living The Life You Were Meant To Live,” made a very interesting comment. God isn’t interested in us just making a living as He is in us “making a life.” Well said! I believe a good question we can ask is are we so consumed with making a living that we have forgotten how to make a life!

In this world of “me” focus and striving to get ahead, maybe we need to take a deep breath, step back a little and get a larger perspective on life. At the end of our lives, I don’t think it will really matter how much money you and I made or how successful we were. I think the questions we will be concerned about are did we love our God and others well? Did we make a difference in this world? It is not that success or money are a bad things, but Jesus was so right when he said that life was so much more than the things that we possess. At the end of our lives, I think it will be more important to know we were the kind of people that loved and served others well rather than what kind of car we drove, the house we lived in or how much money we made. Did we love with God’s love and did others see in us who Jesus really is.

The reality is that there are no guarantees about time. Time is precious. It waits for no one and it’s the one thing we can never get back. If we postpone what we really want to do in this life, people we want to touch or influence, or even a trip we want to take that time may never come. People wait for retirement to pursue a dream. Retirement comes and health fails and the dream never happens.

Are you making a living or making a life? Why postpone even simple joys another day? Why not take the time for a long walk and actually smell the roses and enjoy God’s beautiful creation? It won’t cost you a thing and will not only renew your senses but also clear your head. Why not take time to lay hold of courage and forgive or to tell someone that you love them? Maybe its time to be a voice of encouragement to someone who desperately needs a kind word or hug. Take the time to cultivate some new friendships or get together with old friends over coffee, dinner. What about the possibility of extending an act of service or kindness to a complete stranger just because you can.

Are you making a living or making a life? What a perspective! When we begin to be people of life instead of performing in life our lives can be not only meaningful but lived with no regrets!

Rabu, 20 April 2011

Eye Tricks

Eye tricks? What can you do with your eyes? More on that in a moment. First, let's look at what you can tell by watching a persons eyes.

By watching what they are watching, you can learn a lot about people. What kind of women does a man look at? Does he pay any attention to the game on the TV? Note whether he seems bored or interested as he looks at different things.

Eye watching tricks - part two. You can tell what people's minds are doing when they are thinking or asked to remember something, according to neuro-linguistic programming (NLP) practitioners. This following is true for most right handed people (reverse all this for left-handed people): As you face them, and their eyes go...

Up and to the right - They are remembering a visual image.

Up and to the left - They are constructing a visual image.

To the right - They are remembering sounds or conversation.

To the left - The are constructing sounds or conversations.

Down and to the right - They are in an internal dialog.

Down and to the left - They are accessing kinesthetic feelings, tastes and smells.

Eye Tricks And The Opposite Sex

A persons pupils get bigger when they are aroused, interested and/or receptive. If you look into his or her eyes and see those pupils growing large - it's looking good for you. Basically big pupils (unless it's just dark) mean a person likes what they see.

It isn't just what you see, though, but what you imagine too. Try an experiment to understand how immediate this effect can be. Go right now and look in the mirror at your own eyes. As you look at them, imagine a sexy man or woman you are attracted to - in whatever way would turn you on.

You'll see that your pupils get bigger in just seconds. Actually, if you love to fish, they may get big just thinking about a lake you love. Imagining anything you like to look at can make your pupils bigger.

You'll find that you can quickly train yourself to change your pupil size at will. Just find a mental image or two that gets them really big, and use these as necessary. Look at a light briefly when you want to shrink your pupils back down. Now, how do you use this eye trick?

First, understand that we all unconsciously use little clues like pupil size as we interact with people. We are affected by people's body language even when we haven't yet learned to identify it. There are reasons why we are attracted to a person, even when we don't know what those reasons are.

In other words - the person in front of you will unconsciously pick upon your enlarging pupils. They will unconsciously take this to mean that you like them, and for many people, this will make them like you more. By enlarging your pupils at will, you can effectively establish rapport more quickly. This is one of the easier subliminal eye tricks.

Selasa, 19 April 2011

The mind power within you.

Infinite riches are all around you if you open your mental eyes and behold the treasure house of infinity within you. There is a gold mine within you from which you can extract everything you need to live life gloriously, joyously and abundantly.

Many are sound asleep because they do not know about this gold mine of infinite intelligence and boundless love within themselves. Whatever you want, you can draw forth. A magnetised piece of steel will lift about ten times its own weight, and if you demagnetise this same piece of steel, it will not even lift a feather. Similarly, there are two types of people. There is the magnetised person who is full of confidence and faith. They know they are born to win and to succeed. Then, there is the type of person who is demagnetised. They are full of fears and doubts. Opportunities come, and they say, “I might fail; I might lose my money; people will laugh at me.” This type of person will not get very far in life because, if they are afraid to go forward, they will simply stay where they are. Become a magnetised person and live a successful life in all areas of life.

You can bring into you life more power, more wealth, more health, more happiness and more joy by learning to contact and release the hidden power of your subconscious mind.

Within your subconscious mind depths lie infinite wisdom, infinite power and infinite supply of all that is necessary to live a life of abundance. Through the wisdom of your subconscious mind you can attract the ideal companion, as well as the right business associate or partner. It can provide you with all the money you need, and the financial freedom to be, to do and to go as you heart desires.

The infinite intelligence within your subconscious mind can reveal to you everything you need to know at every moment of time and point of space provided you are open-minded and receptive. You can receive new thoughts and ideas enabling you to bring forth new inventions, make new discoveries, or write books and plays. Moreover, the infinite intelligence in your sub-conscious can impart to you wonderful kinds of knowledge of an original nature. It can reveal to you and open the way for perfect expression and true place in you life.

It is your right to discover this inner world of thought, feeling, and power, of light, love and beauty. Though invisible, its forces are mighty. Within your subconscious mind you will find the solution for every problem, and the cause for every effect. Because you can draw out the hidden powers, you can come into actual possession of the power and wisdom necessary to move forward in abundance, security and joy.

Senin, 18 April 2011

Press Release: Why SEO Experts Should Not Use Press Releases

Rumor has it that press releases are the next big thing in the SEO business, and many companies are spending top dollars trying to write the next big press release announcing the next big balloon breaking technology. But is this really the next big thing?

By definition, a Press Release is a kind of news item released by the company on whom the news is being reported. As such, you will have to compete with all the other press releases and hope that your will get picked up.

Why Will Your Press Release Be Trashed?
1) Unless you are writing a press release about Microsoft, Adobe, Sony or one of the other mega-companies, or at least about a company that is relatively well known, forget about it. Journalists and news editors receive thousands of press releases a day and there is no way that they will waste more than a quick glance. So why should you pay a company seven to eight hundred dollars for them sending your press release to thousands of editors and journalists when they are going to junk it anyway?

2) Unless you are announcing a truly revolutionary product or technology (which I assume you are not since you are only interested in using the professionally paid and written press release to boost your search engine rankings), whatever you make up or announce such as some new free deal or new portal offering something unique, your chances of being picked up are very slim. Yes, the PR companies will tell you that they have vast experience in writing Press Releases that will make yours stand out and get picked up but this is not accurate. The only way your PR is going to get picked up is if it truly is something out of the ordinary or something that no one has ever thought off.

3) Unless you plan to spend millions of dollars and then just by sheer volume your site will go ahead in the search engines, this is not a good option. Why? If you send a large number of press releases then these will be placed on the different PR companies websites main page. Since most of these home pages have a very high page rank, your site will get a boost. The question is whether this boost is worth the large amount of money you will put into the PR companies pocket. No it is not. Use that money to buy (though I do not recommend this) links from high-ranked websites and you will pay less and receive more benefit.

4) Any press release, even if it has been accepted, will remain on the different pages for just a short time, making the time and effort and even more so the amount of money you paid fruitless.

Conclusion:
A press release is useful if you wish to contact the press and maybe get some free publicity, but it is of no use if you wish to use it as a tool in order to advance your website in the search engines.

Minggu, 17 April 2011

Life Advice: A Lost Friend Speaks

When my friend sensed that in a few weeks the light of life was about to be extinguished, and that there was no more hope for him, he called me to his side and said, "If only I had lived my life differently, I might not have felt such an emptiness now. Promise me," he caught my hand, "Promise me that you won't make the same mistake." And when I asked him what mistakes, he asked me to get a pen and paper and to jot down his last words. Here they are in condensed form:

1) Talk less; listen more.

2) Listen to your grandfather's stories about his youth. When he's gone, you will relive the bond through these memories.

3) Invite friend over for a snack or dinner even if the house is a mess.

4) Eat popcorn in the living room even though its messy.

5) Invite the friends who have children home. Don't worry about their children creating a mess.

6) Sit on the grass even though it dirties your pants.

7) Never buy something just because it lasts for a long time or because it is practical.

8) Stay in bed and at home when sick and stop pretending that the world cannot go one without me for a day.

9) Light up the wonderfully crafted candles and let them burn out. Better this than they accumulate dust in the closet.

10) Share life's responsibilities with a partner, not only expenses.

11) (Meant for Women) Instead of waiting for the pregnancy to get over, cherish each moment in your heart. Understand that the life in you is the only chance you will get to help god create magic.

12) Let your children hug and kiss you whenever they wish to. Don't stop them by saying things like: later, go wash your hands first, we have to eat dinner.

13) Say the following two phrases as often as possible: "I love you" and "I am sorry."

14) Stop worrying about who loves or and who doesn't or about what others have or don't have.

15) Cherish all personal human relations.

16) Play with a pet every day. Laugh and run with it and take part in all its antics.

17) Spend more time with the people who love you.

18) Stop sweating because of all the small details and problems of life.

19) Grab every moment, look at it and live it. That moment will never return again.

Her name was Susan, and she had one six year old daughter. Susan taught me these few basic ideals that I have tried to follow in honour of her memory. It has made me a better man, a much nicer husband and in general, a happier person. Even now I can hear her say that God has blessed each and every one of us, and that we should accept these blessings and strive to become stronger both physically, mentally and also emotionally. I will always remember what she said to me the last time we met: "Jack, you are lucky. Don't blow it."

Sabtu, 16 April 2011

How to throw a poker run

My first motorcycle was a 1957 Harley Davidson. When I found the bike for sale I had no money, but I knew I needed to have this motorcycle. So I came up with a way to raise the money and throw a great party at the same time. I threw a Poker Run. The concept of the game is easy. Each person tries to make the best 5 card poker hand.

The way it is played is, each bike has to ride along a planed rout, every few miles there are checkpoints at each checkpoint along the way each bike must stop and receive a card. Along the rout there are 7 checkpoints, and at the end the rider with the best 5 card poker hand wins the prize

Over the years the poker run has been adopted to lovers of many different hobbies.

The poker run was originally an event bikers played on their Harley's, but over the years it has been borrowed by boaters and even runners.

Throwing a poker run is fairly simple but takes time and some not to hard work. The first thing you need to do is get approval from the towns that your poker run will go thru. There may be some paperwork and fees.

You will also need to make sure that at the end of the run is at a park or event hall. Depending on where you live you may also need a permit for the park.

Next you will need riders. By figuring out how much you want to have for the prize money and how much the part after the poker ride will cost you can figure out how many riders you will need and how much the entrance fee will be, but it should be no more then $100 per bike.

The next thing you will need to do is register riders. The best way to do this is to make a website, go to biker bars and biker events in your area. If you live in New York don’t go to Daytona Bike week to sign up riders, most people will not travel that far for a poker run. Try to get locals.

After you have registered the riders you now have to plan for the party. Along with registering riders for your poker run you should also sell tickets so friends and family can join in the party after the ride is over and the poker winner is declared.

The best way to advertise the party is on a local radio station and with posters around town. The more people you can get the more money you will have for a prize and for whatever cause you are trying to raise money for.

You can either, buy your own food and get some friends to help cook or you can look in the phonebook for a caterer and you should be able to find a caterer who will throw you a great BBQ.

Then all you need to do is wait for the big day and enjoy all the bikes, poker, beef and beer.

Jumat, 15 April 2011

When A Technique Doesn't Work Try Another In Managing Your Fears

What do you do when you try to manage your fears and it doesn’t work the first time around? The answer is that you try again with other techniques that might be more effective. Here are some things that a person should consider when managing their fears and anxieties.

The person struggling with the anxiety must realize that managing anxiety and fear takes practice. So when experiencing an anxiety related situation, begin to learn what works, what doesn’t work, and what you need to improve on in managing your fears and anxieties. As you do this, you will become better in dealing with your anxieties.

Try to learn what is the real source of your fears and anxieties. Knowing what the source of your problem is can go a long way in finding the solution. Think about it and try to figure out what is the source of your fears and stress. If you do not know, then ask a professional or a counselor. As a Layman, I learned that finding the source of your fears will put you that much closer in getting better.

Sometimes we get stressed out when everything happens all at once. When this happens, a person should take a deep breath and try to find something to do for a few minutes to get their mind off of the problem. A person could get some fresh air, listen to some music, or do an activity that will give them a fresh perspective on things. Once you do that you will be able to think more clearly.

Learn as much as you can in managing anxiety and depression. There are many books and information that will educate you on how to deal with fear and anxiety. Share this information with others who may come up with new ideas. Education is the key in finding the answers your looking for in managing your fears.

Remember to take it one day at a time. Instead of worrying about how you will get through the rest of the week or coming month, try to focus on today. Each day can provide us with different opportunities to learn new things and that includes learning how to deal with your problems. Focus on the present and stop trying to predict what may happen next week. Next week will take care of itself.

As a Layman, I realize it is not easy to deal with all of our fears. When your fears and anxieties have the best of you, seek help from a professional. The key is to be patient, take it slow, and not to give up. In time, you will be able to find those resources that will help you with your problems.

Kamis, 14 April 2011

How to manage your password smartly

Typically you don't wanna have more than two or three passwords memorized inside your head.

But most of the time that's not a choice. Some sites force you to have alphanumeric passwords, while your banks and credit card access force you to have only numeric passwords.

When it comes time for you to change your password, life start to get really complicated. Sometimes it's the computer system force you to have a new password, sometimes you get phished, sometimes a girlfriend who know your password just broke up with you.

If you are like any friend I know, changing password means having a new kid. Pretty soon you're gonna forget which kid is where, which password is for which login.

That's why password manager is so important to me. There are plenty of great password manager out there. I personally have been using Oubliette for some time (though it's been discontinued). But I know not a lot of people are that diligent with one.

The truth is most people are not that security-conscious. But the way the web has evolved, password manager is no longer about security anymore. It's about freeing up your mind from the unnecessary trash like memorizing seven set of passwords. That's what GTD is all about, take your mind off the mundane stuffs.

As far as password manager goes, there are two way around it. First is the most common option: desktop software solution. Like Oubliette, they typically offer strong encryption, storing your login names, passwords, URLs, emails, categories, and additional notes for each account. For the most secure option, this is the best way to go.

However, I find it increasingly inconvenient that I have to make sure I have the most updated copy of the password file on my thumb drive. If you are like me and use different PCs in multiple locations, you better make sure you have your password file synchronized or you'd regret it just when you need it.

But the worst is when you are using a PC as a guest, and your password manager is not installed there, which is most likely the case.

So I resort to building a web-based password manager, onelurv. Two major reasons I can't do without it.

First is obvious, I have access to it anywhere, no installation needed.

Secondly, I can login to my sites with just one click. Truth is, I'm getting sick and tired of copy and pasting login/password back and forth between my browser and password manager. So I built onelurv to store my login/password and log me in with one click, no more sign in form.

Hence, web-based password manager would be viable if you are less security-demanding and more convenience-oriented.

Rabu, 13 April 2011

The Reality of Imagery for Empowerment

Copyright 2006 Marshall House

Popular is the belief that imagery and imagination are not real. From my point of view, imagination is real: it exists in another dimension of reality than the physical. Imagery is not less real because it is less dense than a chair.

Imagery is a set of mental pictures or images. These mental images are often used to represent objects or actions or ideas. Working with imagery, you can augment or transcend the limitations of physical reality. You can enhance and expand your conscious awareness.

I have observed again and again the power of imagination and imagery to shift an uncomfortable, even painful, situation into one that is more desirable, even pleasurable. I often lead clients through a guided imagery process that empowers them to perceive meaning they did not have before the imagery and use the new wisdom for enhanced personal empowerment.

When people claim they have no imagination, I ask them to tell me how to get to a particular street or well-known landmark in their city. Or I ask them what their plans are for tomorrow. Or I ask them what they had for dinner last night. When you plan a presentation for the boss or staff, you use imagery. When you consider a variety of approaches to ease a relationship, you use imagery. When you imagine a winning game of tennis or golf, you use imagery.

For me, imagery and breathing are in the same category of importance: Life can not exist without either. Surely, not everyone uses imagery or imagination in the same way or to the same level of benefit, but it is the basis for creation.

Form follows thought. And form follows thought, regardless of whether the thought is “positive” or “negative.” The process of imagery is impartial. However, if the images are uncomfortable, disempowering, or negative, the experiences that follow will contain a similar essence of discomfort, disempowerment, or negativity. And, as well, if the images are comfortable, empowering, or positive, the experiences that follow will contain a similar essence of comfort, empowerment, or positive characteristics.

Note the difference between the concept “chair” in the carpenter’s mind and the physical “chair” in your office. The carpenter or architect or artist or manager who successfully holds an image in the mind’s eye is more likely to be able to manifest it in the physical form. The two dimensions work together; one is not better than the other. An image can exist without the physical component, but the physical component does not exist without the image.

Imagery is a power that is your birthright — it comes with the human package. How you use it is your choice. All you have to do is use it with integrity and awareness, and you are empowered!

Selasa, 12 April 2011

Improve Memory With Simple Techniques

Improve memory easily? Yes, there really are some simple techniques, and you can start using them right now. Here are a few to get you started.

1. Tell yourself to remember. When you first learn a person's name, for example, tell yourself, "remember that". This signals your unconscious mind to rank this input higher in importance.

2. Know why you want to remember something. For example, to remember a person, think about how that person will be important to you in the future. If you want to remember fact about something, think about how you'll will need them someday.

3. Visualize the future. Imagine where you'll see a person next, and anything you notice about them. Use this with the last technique. The additional associations will set the memory more firmly in your brain.

4. Retrace your steps. When you forget something, like where you put your keys, you probably retrace your steps. This works, but try it in your mind, as if you were watching yourself from a distance. This can help keep you from blanking out parts of your route, as you did when you first set the keys down.

5. Plan your memory. When you set down the keys on the chair, see yourself walking in and setting the keys on the chair. You could also quickly imagine someone asking where you put them and you answering "on the chair." You'll remember where they are if you do this.

Improve Memory With Proven "Tricks"

I went to a birthday party as a child. A party contest involved looking at a table covered in 15 various items for a few minutes. Then the things were taken away, and then we each got a piece of paper and a pencil. We had to write down as many items as we could remember. I recalled seven or eight, but one little boy got all 15 items, and won the prize.

Years later I learned how he did it. His father taught him a simple technique that none of us other kids knew. The trick is to tie the items together in an imaginative story. Let's say you want to remember the following things: milk, soap, forks, honey, and flowers.

You create a story, and see it vividly in your head: At the bathroom sink, you reach for the soap, but the soap dish is filled with milk, so you wash your hands with that, then comb honey into your hair with a fork, pick up a bouquet of flowers and smile at yourself in the mirror. Repeat each item to yourself as you review this "movie" in your imagination, and you'll remember all five things, even the next day.

Create Good Memory Habits

Guess what the biggest problem with memory techniques is? Remembering to use them. Seriously, there are many great methods, but if you don't have the habit of using them, you'll forget to when you need them most. With any technique, make a conscious effort to use it until it becomes automatic. That's how to improve memory.

Senin, 11 April 2011

How to Make People Like You by Being a Good Listener

The most significant skill to develop is how to be a good listener. Being a good listener doesn't mean being a shoulder for people to cry on. A good listener is someone who lets the speaker know he/she's listening. Here's what being a good listener can do for you:

You get more facts
With good listening skills, you can learn more and get more information. With more information, you also understand the situation better.

You don't waste time"just listening"
Pretending to listen or barely absorbing any information is just a waste of time. Instead, listen fully and seek more information to make the most use of your time.

You are seen as an intelligent and successful person
By listening fully, the speaker will also appreciate your attention and will see you as an intelligent and successful person. All intelligent and successful people have good listening skills.

You will be caring and likeable
This has been said many times over and over, but it is one of the most important reasons for being a good listener. These traits can create a relationship and bond with the speaker.

Being a good listener requires more than just listening. Here are some expert method to how you can have good listening skills:

Say encouraging words
I'm listening, tell me more, hmm, go on. Those are examples of encouraging words to tell the speaker that you're listening and you care.

Give your full attention
Look at the speaker's eye. Do not wander looking at something else, even for a split second. If you get nervous looking at someone, you may look away to an inatimate object as if you're profoundly thinking about the speaker's words.

Repeat key words
"7 on Friday. Got that". Repeat back bits of their words. Don't make them feel like they're talking to a doll.

Ask for repetition or clarifiation
For any parts that you dozed off, don't understand, or think is important, ask them about it. Do not wait till a minute later when you don't understand anything that he/she is desribing. If there is an important point that requires your interest, ask them to confirm what you heard. For example, "9 on Friday?".

Ask for their opinion
When the speaker describes something that happened to him/her, ask what he/she felt about. Let the speaKer know that he/she is important and that you care about what he/she is talking about.

Write down notes
I'm not telling you to write down everything they say as if you were attending a class. Write down key points and if you need time to write it down, ask them to pause for a second. Make sure you remember what was being discussed and ask the speaker to resume.

Minggu, 10 April 2011

How to Keep Food Fresh Naturally

How many times have we brought food and then forgotten about it only to remember it because it begins to stink? Against this, you cannot do anything, but you can ensure that your food lasts longer and keeps fresh.

How?
There are many things you can do, such as regularly clean your refrigerator and regularly check the food in there and also that you keep in the cupboards or anywhere else. But its not just about checking them. This cannot prevent anything. All you will be doing is throwing away food items before they stink up the entire kitchen. So, what can you do to keep the food fresh?

Practical List of Tips for Ensuring Food is Cleaner and Fresher:
1) Spread some cloves on and around the marble surface of your kitchen, and also spread some cloves under the sink.
Why?
The Cloves keeps ants away.

2) Place some bay leaves inside your bags of dough, rice and the rest of the packs that insects prefer.
Why?
Bay leaves keep insects and other such lice away from food products. By placing bay leaves inside the packets, we ensure that insects do not reside there. But please remember to change the bay leaves once every three months.

3) Place half a potato in the refrigerator.
Why?
If there is any kind of bad smell from food or cooked items, the half potato will absorb it. To make sure that this works, remember to exchange the potato every three days.

4) Store eggs with the pointed side down.
Why?
Storing eggs with the pointed side down keeps them fresh for a longer period.

5) Place a few cubes of sugar in the jar where you store American cheese.
Why?
When you place two or three cubes of sugar with the American cheese in an air tight jar, the sugar absorbs the moisture and prevents the cheese from getting bad.

6) Do not store tomatoes and cucumbers in the same draw.
Why?
Tomatoes give out gases that cause cucumbers to rot faster so make sure that you keep these two apart.

7) Do not store apples along with the rest of the fruits and vegetables.
Why?
Apples give out certain gases that cause fruits and vegetables to rot.

8) Place slices of apples or raw potatoes in the bread compartment or jar.
Why?
By adding a few slices of raw potatoes or apples with the bread, you ensure that the bread remains fresh for longer than usual.

9) Store radish in a vessel along with some water.
Why?
You should store radish in a vessel along with water because water will keep the radish fresh and crisp for a long time. For the same reason, if the radishes have shriveled, place them in a jar of cold water. Water will restore the radish to its previous splendor.

Conclusion:
Here, I have presented only a few of the more practical actions you should follow to ensure that the food you and your family consume remains fresh and tasty.

Sabtu, 09 April 2011

Online Scams: How To Avoid Getting Fooled

Beware of the three ways of getting fooled into giving up your money through seemingly innocent money-making schemes. Scams are all around us and it can be found in every single area of life, but more so in such areas where the risk is greater such as when dealing with credit cards, bank accounts and other activities which involve sending or receiving money online.

The Bank/Credit Card Email Scam:
If you get an email asking you to sign up to your bank account or credit card through the email because your privacy is under danger or just to receive a free gift or something: BEWARE! Do not sign up through the internet address provided in the email. If the email does make you anxious, go to the bank or credit card site using the address you know already or through searching the search engines.
How Does This Scam Work?
The senders of the email know that only a very few will sign up but that is all they need. When you signed up to the bogus internet address, they got your user and password. Now its time for them to party!

The Missing Millionaire Scam:
If you receive an email saying that they represent a dead or missing former ruler, high-ranking official or businessman from an African, Gulf or even Russian: BEWARE! They offer you a chance to earn anything between one to five percent of ten to fifty million. And for your co-operation only. Don't get sucked into this, for though they speak of giving you money, they will receive cash and from your account.
How Does This Scam Work?
They will ask you for your bank details in order to transfer the cash and then they will use that to transfer a small amount. Now, once you trust them, they will ask you for more personal and secure details because they "need" that to transfer the entire sum in and out of your account. What they won't tell you is that they will transfer all the money out from your account: theirs and yours.

The Make Money Fast Scam:
This is the most innocent of the lot, but that is also why it is the most dangerous. These are so-called companies that advertise that if you only sign up and use their system, you will mint money. Please do not fall for such schemes. They will pay you some money but then once trust is built, they will fleece your bank account. Remember that quick money scams are the surest and fastest way to lose all your money!

Conclusion:
Whatever you do online, always remember that the internet is not a safe place. Treat it like you would treat any other business venture and bring up your guard. If you play it safe and check out the companies before committing, you will be able to guard yourself against losing money to crooks.

Jumat, 08 April 2011

Life Advice: Looking Through a Window

Living in today's metropolitan world of cellular phones, mobile computers and other high-tech gadgets is not just hectic but very impersonal. We make money and then invest our time and effort in making more money. Does it end? Not usually because we are never satisfied. How many times have we convinced ourselves that if only we had some more money, life would be so sweet? But then, after receiving a substantial raise, we realize that it wasn't enough and that we need more?

What Should You Do?
I have read many books on life such as Robin Sharma's Monk says this and the monk says that, and they all seem to say that money is not necessary. But it is. Can you do without cash and a lot of it? I know I can't.

So, I went to the neighbourhood Rabbi and asked for advice that will help me find my true way in life.

The rabbi nodded and took me to the window. "What do you see?" he asked me.

Promptly, I answered, "I can see people walking to and fro and a blind man is begging for alms at the left corner."

The Rabbi nodded and guided me to a big mirror. "Now look and tell me what you see?"

"I can see myself," I man answered.

The Rabbi smiled. "Now you can't see anyone else. The mirror and the window are both created from the same raw material: glass, but because on one of them they have applied a thin layer of silver, when you look at it all you can see is your own reflection."

The Rabbi placed his arm on my shoulders. "Compare yourself to those two pieces of glass. Without the silver layer, you saw the other people and felt compassion for them. When you are covered with silver, you see only yourself."

I looked at the Rabbi and stared. "I don't understand."

The Rabbi continued. "You will become someone only if have the courage to remove the silver covering over your eyes in order to again see and love others." He patted me on my back and sent me on my way.

I have thought of what he said and come to the conclusion that he had a point. Yes. We need money and we should not aim to lead a moneyless existence; its pointless and will only cause us and our families many heartbreaks in the future.

Instead, I suggest that we should follow the advice the Rabbi gave me. When we approach life through a silver covering, all we are able to see is ourselves. But discard that covering, and you will be able to see and feel everyone else.

Conclusion:
In life, we are allowed to and should be able to look at both kinds of mirrors, but we should remember that a mirror reflects only us; a window is the door to compassion, health and true wealth. In other words, seek wealth by all means, but don't let it dissuade you from life, people, children and the poor and needy.

Kamis, 07 April 2011

Fame, Money, And Success Will Not Take Away Your Fears

Your fears, anxieties, and other problems have the best of you and you don’t know where to turn for help. At some point you feel totally helpless as you struggle each day. As a layman and an author of a Managing Fear book, there were times that my fears had the best of me. One of the things that I’ve learned is that you can have all the money in the world and be well known by many people, but when it comes down to it, none of it matters when it comes to dealing with your persistent fears and anxieties. Fame, money, and success will not take away your fears.

The one source that a person should use as a basis in managing their fears and anxieties is using God/Jesus as a basis in dealing with their fears. Why? The power of God is the one power that is stronger than your fears and anxieties. Also, God loves each one of us and he is the one person who has the power to solve all of our problems. He will help you if you ask him to.

The first step a person should do in dealing with their fears is to start talking and praying to God. A person can go to church or to a quiet place during the day to tell God that they are having a problem. They should tell God how they feel and ask God for some of his help. A person could also review the Bible and read some articles on trusting in God and then apply these concepts in their life. Each and every day, a person should make it up a habit to talk to God and ask him for his help.

Some people think that the answers that God provides must be religious in nature. That is not always the case. God may provide the answers in a way that might not be religious in nature. These answers could involve basic psychology and cognitive techniques that deals with how to manage fear and anxiety. The point to remember is that although a person may use these psychology methods, its important to use God/Jesus as the center of everything in your life and in your struggle.

If you have trouble, talk to a member of the clergy or a professional counselor to help deal with your fears and anxieties.

As a layman, I realize the most important thing is to continue praying and talking to God. Talk to God as if you were talking to a friend. Read the Bible and pray hard. Be persistent and be open in the avenues that God may provide to you in solving your problem. It is not always easy, however God is in control and he will help you if you ask him.

Rabu, 06 April 2011

Symphony of Human Dynamics

Copyright 2006 Marshall House

Differences are inevitable when two or more persons come together. It would be pointless and boring for two or more to come together if there are no differences. Some differences are pleasant; others can be disconcerting. Differences can accelerate to disharmony, conflict, competition, or war.

While a reasonable amount of conflict can be creative and enriching, conflict that is not properly managed can be harmful. Interpersonal conflicts — as contrasted to conflicts of ideas or principles — are in special need of careful management. Viewing conflict or disharmony as the expression of differences can help to take the fear from conflict. Of course, if it is a heated or emotionally charged conflict, just re-naming it is unlikely to defuse the charge. But it may be enough for you to find your place of harmony in the conflict.

Living in conscious harmony is like playing in a symphony — and knowing that we are playing in a symphony. At any given moment, our section of the orchestra may be in temporary harmony or temporary disharmony. Both group members and musicians must have the conscious intention to strive for harmony without being discouraged by the momentary notes of disharmony that add interest to the experience.

The symphony’s composer wrote a score which the conductor interprets and the musicians play with different instruments, in their own style, according to their ability. At some times, we are more aware of one instrument than another. Or we hear a solo or a duet.

When we listen deeply to the music, we notice space between the notes: rhythm. Colors and tones and volume add texture and interest: timbre. We have different responses to different parts: feelings.

Satisfaction increases when everyone in the orchestra reads at the same place on the same sheet of music. At some times, it’s important for a musician to play softly to blend with the rest of the sounds and add texture. At other times, it’s important to play loudly, even being the center of attention. Rhythms might change, even in the middle of a piece. Sounds might “fight” with each other to heighten drama before leading to resolution.

Joy happens when everyone perceives the symphony as all One, with each instrument playing an important part. In order to live in conscious harmony, we must embrace the concept that we are all One. Comparing the interactions of individuals in groups to a the interactions of musicians in a symphony or an orchestra can be powerful.

What is the song you will sing or the dance you will dance or the instrument you will play today?

Selasa, 05 April 2011

How Fears Develop

There have been talks about fears and phobias, and how they affect life. Fear is really the misconception, the rejection, and the dread of life.

There are thousands of life definitions available around. Often, these meanings seek or require a happy, if not perfect, life in this world. We are urged to seek out a paradise or a niche of refuge where we can build our utopia or ideal world.

But what really is life? If we honestly study human drama in history, we would see that real life is the concoction of good and bad, sad and happy. How to be happy in all these circumstances is what you make out of your life. We all create our life meanings. We cannot just borrow others’ meanings or get one from a book. We discover real life through actual life encounters. How we end up after each ordeal gives us our real life.

Life is a concoction of both extremes. Real life entails going through these ordeals. When you reject this idea and look for other life meanings — the kind where you live happily ever after — fears start to develop. You begin to look for fairy tale stuffs in life and reject the ones you actually have. Fear comes in, rejecting what is real. People who live in war zones have a realistic idea of life: You live now; you may die the next moment. They see that life is temporary — which is the truth. Thus, they are prepared to die anytime. Fears are still intact, but considerably lessened.

People who reject the truth are afraid to look at scenes of death or tragedy. The more they reject them, the more the fear grows within them. Many books on fears tell their readers to avoid seeing violence. You ought not to look for violence and watch it, but you ought not to close your eyes to it when there is one right under your nose. Life will always show you both extremes.

Mother Theresa was a non-violent person. Yet, she watched injustice and violence everyday, right where she was. She didn’t feel fear for these daily scenes; instead she felt love and concern in the midst of it all. She knew and lived a real life. Jesus Christ and Mahatma Gandhi were for non-violence. Yet they found real meaning and real life as they were caught in the middle of chaos and turmoil. These excellent people lived the real life. They even conquered others’ fears.

The rejection of the real life is the start of real fears. Fearful and phobic people refuse reality and build their own fantasy world.

Senin, 04 April 2011

Like Your Garden Your Mind Can Grow Weeds Too!

How many of you have a garden in your backyard where you grow your favorite vegetables. You plant them from seeds or seedlings and give them everything they need in order to grow and thrive. You water, fertilize and provide adequate sun. After several months they grow to be big and strong. You run out to pick them daily as they ripen and think to your self. “ I grew these and they taste so good.”

What happens though if you plant your vegetables and forget about them? WEEDS! That’s right your garden now begins to become overtaken by nasty weeds and other plants you have no idea what they may be. Your precious vegetables start to have problems thriving and eventually die or produce fruit you have no desire to eat.

Your garden is like your mind. When you are a child you are given the proper care and nurturing by you parents to give you good habits, a good education and the tools you need to succeed and grow up strong and confident.

What happens along the way is kind of sad. You are exposed to weeds. Just like your garden. Bad influences in your life sometimes become planted in your mind if you can not fight them off. Things such as smoking, nail biting, procrastination, having a bad temper, being lazy, using drugs or being overweight. Theses are only a few of the many habits or should we say weeds, which your mind is susceptible too.

With all these negative influences one might think that there in no chance of changing habits or negative behavior. Well, This is not the case. The mind is a very strong. In fact what you say and think about yourself does come true. If you believe that you want to change your mind will follow. Once your subconscious is reprogrammed the negative things or weeds will be replaced with positive thoughts and behaviors. The unconscious labels we have created for ourselves are changed releasing us from our old behavior patterns or habits. As we remove the old labels new positive ones are created leaving us feeling better about ourselves and what we have accomplished.

Just like the happy, joyful feeling you have while eating the big juicy red tomato from your garden, which you worked so hard on. You will feel ecstatic and excited that you changed the behaviors you disliked about yourself. That feeling can not be matched by any other, The feeling that you are in control.

Minggu, 03 April 2011

Use Your Commute

Two commutes a day, ten a week, forty a month, about 440 times a year. If you commute 45 minutes to work, that is ninety minutes a day, 1,650 hours a year!

You know those goals you’ve been meaning to achieve? Why not use this time to work on them! How you choose to use the time is as broad as your imagination.

So much of our commuting time now is spent as a negative experience, that it drains us for other activities in our day. When we use our commuting time to benefit ourselves and make accomplishments, it not only will benefit us, but you will see positive impacts at work, home and play!

Using the time to organize your day at work will help you to be more productive at work and less time will be spent away from home and play. The more you are able to achieve, the goals you have been putting off will no longer seem like clouds hanging over you, and will free you up to both mentally and physically.

If you have things to do for the day call into the office (on speaker phone) and go over things that will make your day at the office more organized. If you never have time to write, bring a tape recorder and narrate your stories in your car. If you’re into exercise, isometrics (muscle contractions held for a count of 10 and repeated; do not do this if you are hypertensive or have a heart disorder) are well-documented to work in developing muscle. There are, of course, books on tape and even courses on various subjects. Why not take the time to enrich your life.

The commute is also a great time to schedule the day or review how the day went. Whatever you choose to do, getting value out of the commute helps to change your attitude about the commute and relaxes you throughout the time because you are focused on something more interesting than counting the minutes or the traffic jams. So now, instead of a major block to living, the commute can actually become an opportunity to advance your life.

Think of ten activities that you can do during your commute, and prepare some of them ahead of time. This way if you don’t feel like doing one, you have another ready to go, even if it’s just as simple as listening to your favorite music. You won’t always want to read or listen to music, so you might be prepared to work on a puzzle or compose a letter or song in your head. Your commute is as open to possibilities as you are!

Sabtu, 02 April 2011

Managing The Fear Of Rejection In Today’s World

We have all gotten turned down from a job interview, sports team try out, or even a date. It can sometimes be difficult to overcome the feelings of rejection and to try again. As a result, here is a list of techniques a person can use to help get over the feelings of not making it on the first or second try.

When getting turned down, the key is to learn from your mistakes and to give it another try. Doing anything in life requires practice and persistence. For example, remember the time when you first learned to ride a bike. The first few times, you kept following off the bike. With some practice and some time, you were able to ride your bike with no problem. Everything we do is a learning experience so do not get discouraged if you don’t make it on the first or second time.

Sometimes, our negative thoughts will get the best of us when we fail to get what we want. A technique that is very helpful is to have a small notebook of positive statements that make us feel good. Whenever you come across an affirmation that makes you feel good, write it down in a small notebook that you can carry around with you in your pocket. Whenever you feel discouraged, open up your small notebook and read those statements.

If you have trouble accomplishing a certain task, visualize yourself doing the task in your mind. For instance, you and your team have to play in the championship volleyball game in front of a large group of people in the next few days. Before the big day comes, imagine yourself playing the game in your mind. Imagine that your playing in front of a large audience. By playing the game in your mind, you will be better prepared to perform for real when the time comes. Use this same technique in your situation. Visualize yourself succeeding at your goal.

Asking for help can make a difference. Talking to someone who has been there can give us insights on how to overcome our current situation. A friend can also provide encouragement and remind us that we are not alone. Also remember to take it one day at a time. Focus on the present and try not to predict what may happen down the road.

As a Layman and author of an anxiety book, I have gone through much adversity in dealing with fear and anxiety. The key is not to give up and to learn from your mistakes. In time, you will become more knowledgeable and experienced and eventually you will accomplish your goals.

Jumat, 01 April 2011

How to Start Your Own Small Business

Opening your own business can be a real big gamble. If you do not do your research well, you will wind up like most small businesses, and that is out of business in less then 6 months.

The most important thing to remember when opening up new business is the location. When doing your research for your new business you want to make sure you are the only business of your time in the area. If you are opening a video store you do not want to open near another video store. Remember if you are exclusive to the area, you will automatically get the business of those living in that area.

The next most important thing about opening a small business is you supplier. Do not have just one place to get supplies from, you should have several. By having more then one you can assure yourself that you are getting the lowest prices from them. And if they know about each other they will try to outdo each other to get your business.

Make sure that the products or services that you will be offering are desired, do not just decide to open up a store with out doing any market research is like playing craps, dangerous unless you really know what you are doing.

Advertising is important. Remember just like a casino you are trying to make money and not lose it. By spending some money on advertising you will increase your sales from your opening day. It is best to have a professional help you with your advertising rather then dong it yourself, there is no point in spending money on advertising if no one in your target demographic is going to see it. An example of this would be like using facial expressions to bluff in a poker game against blind players.


When picking your stock it is sometime better to have a better selection of items and maybe not so many of each item, this way you can see which items sell best and order more of those more popular items, and less of the less desired ones.


In business you should not try to open a business unless you already have experience running a related business. You may think you know how to, but to do it correctly you really need experience, after all if you were in a casino and looking to play poker you would not want a roulette dealer who is trying to figure out the rules as he goes would you? Chances are you would want an experienced poker dealer.

Depending on the type of business you are opening try keep your staff as small as possible, and if it is possible try to get friends and family to help you out. This will allow you to keep your costs low until you can really get a good idea of if you are making money or not. Once you are making money you can go out and hire people.