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Rabu, 31 Maret 2010

Anger Management Therapy for Dementia Patients

Older people sometimes develop dementia, a somewhat common condition that results in mental and emotional confusion. Some of these people, often those who are institutionalized, display anger outbursts due to relatively mild provocations, such as an unwanted meal item. At other times the anger is warranted, as when another resident initiates a conflict. For reasons like these and others, anger management therapy for dementia patients is becoming increasingly important.

Symptoms That May Warrant Anger Management Therapy

It may be difficult to determine at first who is eligible for anger management therapy. Residents with dementia who live at home or in nursing facilities often try to express themselves in non-traditional ways. While someone who wants their breakfast oatmeal served hotter can just say so, someone with dementia might be able to just make anxious sounds, pace, or even throw the oatmeal on the floor. If someone in your care exhibits dissatisfaction with some aspect of daily care, try to figure out what is bothering the person, and make any needed adjustments that you can.

Dementia patients may raise their voice, swing their arms, push, shove, or yank at things or people to convey their irritation. Caregivers must learn to decipher true anger from confusion or self-defense against other aggressive residents. Anger management therapy should be considered for those who express real anger inappropriately.

Some dementia residents may withdraw socially, stop talking to others, or gesticulate excitedly when they are upset. Sometimes these actions are in response to legitimate concerns, while at other times they may reflect unsuitable anger that needs to be redirected. If the person is able to understand and respond to caregivers in appropriate ways, he or she may be eligible for anger management therapy.

Anger Management Therapy for Dementia Patients

Any anger management therapy facilitator or coordinator who works with dementia residents will need to understand the way that those with dementia communicate, and the types of triggers that can draw their anger. This may require some training in long-term facility care, gerontology, and dementia behaviours. The therapist may attempt group or individual therapy, depending on the patient’s needs and abilities.

In anger management therapy, the coordinator may try to make the resident understand the consequences of anger outbursts, or attempt to teach the resident how to redirect anger in acceptable ways. At times, the therapist might want to work with the resident’s physician, social worker, and family to achieve the best results. This type of effort could take a long time and may be only partially successful yet, any progress is undoubtedly helpful.

Family members and caregivers who want to know more can visit websites like anger-management-information.com for more complete information on how to address this key social and interpersonal behavior. They also can get in touch with the doctor, nursing staff, and social worker for help in assisting a dementia patient through anger management therapy that may lead to improved outcomes for the resident and those that provide his or her care and support.

Selasa, 30 Maret 2010

Anger Management Seminars

If you have problems controlling your temper, you may want to consider enrolling in one of the many popular anger management seminars. There are sure to be some available in your area. If not, you can always suggest that a social services organization sponsor one of these anger management seminars. They are helpful and often fun ways to deal with a potentially distressing problem that can affect the lives of many people.

First, learn a little bit more about anger management in general, and anger management seminars, in particular, by visiting websites like anger-management-information.com. There you can access loads of helpful information about anger management techniques, training, and support, as well as other useful data. Although some sites may not list locations of actual anger management seminars in your area, you can find one near you by browsing the telephone directory yellow pages or white business pages. Then all you have to do is call the listed number for details.

Why Enroll in Anger Management Seminars?

Anger management seminars are held for people who have trouble controlling their tempers. They may be prone to unexpected verbal outbursts, or they might act out their anger in unacceptable ways by raising their voice, arguing with others on little provocation, or becoming physically violent and possibly hurting themselves or others, as well as perhaps damaging furniture or other items. Sometimes you just can’t reason with people who get out of control in this fashion. That’s when an expert may be able to offer advice, therapy, suggestions, or group dynamics to provide support for someone struggling with anger management.

People of all ages may need to register for anger management seminars. Even children can sometimes lose control when they are overcome by extremely negative emotions stemming from family issues, emotional trauma, or other hurtful situations. Aged people with dementia or other conditions also struggle with anger, sometimes, and may need help in learning to redirect their frustrations and irritations in appropriate ways. Recovering addicts, chronic abusers, and the girl next door all may have the common need for learning how to manage stress and avoid acting out their anger in ways that are harmful to themselves or to others.

What Happens in Anger Management Seminars?

If you decide to attend one or more anger management seminars, you will probably meet a trained therapist or psychologist who will teach the group about anger as an emotion and its suitable as well as unsuitable manifestations. You will meet other people who are learning to recognize the triggers to their angry outbursts, and everyone can exchange ideas for what works and what doesn’t in learning to process difficult emotions. You may be offered print or other media resources that can be taken home and utilized when needed. Perhaps you will receive individual counseling that will assist you in addressing unresolved personal or family issues that may be the source of unmanaged anger.

Give some thought to your emotional displays to decide whether anger management seminars may have something to offer you.

Senin, 29 Maret 2010

Anger And Rejections

Rejections are normal and we all are told no on many occasions. Some persons have difficulty handling rejections and may react hastily to the other person involved. If you walk in a bank and apply for a loan and are rejected you might stomp out the door shouting obscene talk to the lenders. This is not an appropriate way to handle the situation.

This in fact can get you in trouble and it is obvious that rejections are triggers to your emotions that enforce your anger. Now that you see this is a trigger you will need to learn how to cope with your anger and emotions. We can start with the technique to work through your anger by reducing your stress. If you are a spontaneous person then you will need to learn how to cut back on stressors. If you feel pressured in the morning before going to work, try picking out the clothes you will wear for that day the following evening.

This will provide you an extra few minutes during the morning to prepare for work. If you are running like a mad person to meet classes, then you might want to set up a schedule for your self that includes time management. This can help you learn to prepare ahead and stay on top of things without rushing. Instead of roaming thoughts through your head about what you, need to do each day, try handling one task at a time.

This works wonders once you practice and continue with your strategy. When you feel angry, try taking a few deep breaths before you speak. You may also want to practice exercising since this burns energy and often reduces your chances of exploding when your emotions are threatened. If you cannot handle rejections, coach your mind to believe that the person is not centering you out. Repeat over in your mind that no is a positive in many cases.

For example, if you are married, you enjoy going to the bar to chat with your friends, and your husband does not want you to go, and then think why he said no? Obviously, your husband cares about you since he knows that danger is potentially high at bars. He does not want you to get hurt therefore, he is saying no in your best interest. If the bank turns you down on a loan there is a legit reason. Maybe your credit report needs some repairing, or maybe they felt you income would not cover the loan amount.

Therefore, you best interest was at heart again. We all hear no throughout our lifetime and most times, it is for the best reasons. If you apply for a job and are turned down, it might be in your best interest, since the employers felt that your skills were not on the level that the job required of you. Alternatively, you may be over qualified for the job and when you are rejected, the employers are merely saying we do not have the cash to pay you for what you are worth. Thinking positive is always great for managing anger.

If you are prompt to explode when your emotions are interrupted then it is difficulty to manage your life. If you are angry most likely, all areas of your life seem like an uphill travel. When you gain control this often benefits everyone, including your self. Your life starts to improve and your mind is thanking you for removing stress from its cavity. If you are prone to beat your self up when rejections come your way, you might want to find a positive side of your being and enforce it in your mind repeatedly.

Practice makes perfect and this is a great way to train your mind so that you gain control of your mind and anger. If you are frustrated easily, it is probably because you do not take time out of a day for your self to relax. There is nothing wrong with relaxing. Therefore you can sit down for 30 minutes each day and yoga or think of nothing at all. Finally, we are closing so I wanted to let you know that once you practice the strategies for dealing with anger, pat your self on the back each time you make effort and achieve.

Minggu, 28 Maret 2010

Analysis : What's In It For us?

Hand analysis and Hand reading isn't really anything dark or extremely predictive anymore. It is however not that accurate either. It is more modern, logical and almost scientific in approach today and has moved from it's ancient fortune telling roots and tendencies.Modern hand reading has evolved to something more akin to a correctional, motivational and something like a hand-holding tool which can be a great help to get your life back into perspective. It has emerged as an awesome way to introspect oneself and be able to chart out our lives in the right way, getting it back onto course ( If it went wayward, that is!).
 
Since it delves on what kind of person you are as  it throws light upon what might be the best course of action in your life : It might tell you as to which course you must be taking up; which career might suit you better; what kind of people might you be getting along with; where you might end up in relationships; who might make a better spouse for you; what kind of person should you rather be; how you would want to break free ; your approach to problem-solving, decision making and reacting to different situations life can throw at you and a horde of other things which would have all just passed away as mere figments of thinking from an over-worked and constantly stressed mind. 

Coupled with psychology, it could prove to be a powerful tool to get a thorough insight about the kind of person you really are. Not only that, it can provide professional help to people who need such help on a regular basis. If you just looked around and put your finger on the level of stress that is floating around in the corporate world today, chances are that your finger would just get burnt. In such a frenetically paced, rat-race infected, jet-age that we live in, tools like these only give the much needed respite in re-directing the entire course of your existence that is threatened to burn itself out. Family behavioural traits, how you would probably behave in different situations and such like is largely dependent on how your ancestors where and this, yet again, can be ascertained from modern hand reading.  

 The uses are many, but the important thing that ought to be remembered is that there is a little bit of unlearning that we might have to do when we deal with ancient subjects like these because what we believe isn't really what we see and what you see generally changes over time. If you ask as to what it can do for you, it might not be much,  but then , if you really wanted to change, it can be something which you can use.

Sabtu, 27 Maret 2010

An Old Message For A New Age

Do you consider yourself a seeker? I have a feeling if you’re reading this article, you do.

If so, how exactly do you define it? What does it mean to you to be a “seeker?”

For me, the definition is constantly in process of clarifying itself, shifting in and out of focus as I ask, “What is it that I’m seeking?” There have been times – days, weeks, months, dare I say years – that it felt like wandering, lost and lonely, in search of a nameless, faceless something that seemed forever before me, but like a mirage, moving farther away the closer I drew. I could not grasp it, but I knew that when found it would make all the pieces of my life click together. Instant happiness and abundance, perfect peace and love. Most of all, everything would finally make sense. I’d know my purpose; I’d be brave enough to live it; I’d have no question that I couldn’t readily answer.

I can tell you, after so much time in the desert, I have found no such “something.” But that doesn’t mean the journey has not been fruitful.

In its finest moments the search has been a pilgrimage. One with the hue of holiness. And in those rare instances I know clearly what it is I seek. I’d like to share a story.

Several years ago my husband’s company sponsored a celebrity golf tournament. We attended, and I surprised myself at how star-struck I was! Especially since the stars were sports figures with whom I was barely familiar. Of all of them, the kindest was David Robinson of the San Antonio Spurs. Walking next to him, my head came only to his elbow, but I found him to be a gentle giant. Late in the day I, along with many others, asked for his autograph. When he gave me back the piece of paper it had on it his name and the letters and numbers “Matthew 6:33.” I overheard someone explain that he always places a verse from the Bible on his autographs – a different one for each person.

Well, I am someone who does not take things in vain – I believe that everything that happens is a perfect set-up for our growth and learning. So, I went home and looked up the verse. Upon reading it I had one of those “pilgrim” moments.

Matthew 6:33Seek ye first the Kingdom of God and His Righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you as well.

The perfect message for a true seeker. But, of course, the question follows…what does it mean? I know that some will have a very clear-cut answer, but for me it has taken years of touching upon, moving away from, and coming back to the message…to find for myself the meaning. The day I received the verse I typed it up and put it in my meditation space, where I have looked upon it every day since. But lately it has begun to call for my attention more fervently, demanding from me a clearer understanding.

Ultimately, I have come to realize this one sentence as the most basic ingredient for living, and the word that has always stood out to me is “first.” Here, the order of things. In our society we are driven by the desire to obtain - material possessions, personal achievement, physical perfection…we strive first and we strive hard. But in this verse we are asked not to “do” first, but to seek. We are told where to begin.

I would like to go slowly, go back and explore this simple message, piece by piece…

Seek ye first the Kingdom of God…

Is this the answer to the interminable question, “What do I seek?”? If so, then I ask, “What exactly is this ‘Kingdom of God’ that I am after?” My mind immediately travels to another verse – Luke 17:21, which says, “Neither shall they say, Lo here! or, lo there! for, behold, the Kingdom of God is within you.”

And so, it is not something beyond my grasp that constantly beckons me. It is not a place, or thing, a job or person, a philosophy, idea or fragment of knowledge. It is not to be found in books or buildings. That which is sought is the Divine reflection within my own being, that same reflection alive within yours and in everything else. The dwelling place of the holy lives no farther than the beat of our own hearts.

For those of us who have been on this quest for a while, this idea is nothing new. I realize that. We read books about getting to know and love and be ourselves. We take classes and workshops in the hopes of prying open the door to that illusive hallowed ground we’re after. At the end of every yoga class we say, “Namaste,” the Hindu recognition of the Divine spark within us all. I, like you, know where I’m supposed to look; I can think and speak about it; but it is the experience that I am after – that which cannot be spoken of or written about in whole. That which absolutely cannot be taught or bought. That which is secret and private and can only be known in the silent places of one’s own soul.

Seek ye first the Kingdom of God…Seek first the Divine within…Seek first, your own truth.

And then we read on…

…and His Righteousness…

Now, here is a phrase for contemplation. For some it is instantly understood and revered; for others, it will make the hair on the back of your neck stand up. It is a loaded word; one that can scare with its asking.

If it is the knowing of our highest selves, a re-union with our own Divinity and, I suspect, with the greater Divinity of all life that we seek, and if we hold faith that the source of Divinity is indwelling, then how do we define this righteousness? I believe that the answer will lie in your own definition, image and knowing of God.

Jumat, 26 Maret 2010

An Age Old Secret For Accessing Knowledge

Over the centuries, human beings have developed many techniques to gain access to their inner wisdom and improve learning.

One technique that many people have found very beneficial is to have an imaginary guide  that they can call on for advice and insight.

A modern variation of this technique has been developed by intelligence researcher Dr. Win Wenger and it is detailed in his book “The Einstein Factor”

This exercise is sometimes called “Putting on the Expert’s Head”  

This technique enables you to access some of the enormous untapped potential that resides in the mind of every individual.  This technique can even accelerate your ability to develop a new skill.  It gives you access to parts of yourself that you are normally not aware of.

The first step is to decide what knowledge or skill you would like to develop in yourself.  What are you interested in that you would like to do better?  You might wish to improve your skill at archery, portrait painting, doing mathematics, or playing a musical instrument.   

Once you have decided what skill or knowledge you would like to develop, take some time to think about those people you consider an expert in this chosen field.  Whose skills do you admire?  Who do you think of as a great role model and expert in the field?

The person need not be currently living.  Before you move ahead with this exercise, you may wish to research the life of the person you have chosen.

You might even decide you want to see the world from the perspective of your favorite animal or bird, such as a wolf or an eagle.

When you are ready to do the Expert’s Head exercise, prepare yourself by deeply relaxing your body and your mind.  Take some time to get comfortable in a place where you will not be disturbed.  Internally scan your body for tension, and allow your muscles to relax.  Breathe calmly and smoothly in a relaxed way. 

Now think:  is there a particular place where you would like to meet your imaginary expert?  You might want to meet this guide in your own home, but feel free to imagine another site.  For example, you could visualize meeting in a beautiful garden, in a forest, on top of a mountain, or some other location. 

You can improve your ability to visualize imaginatively by speaking out loud your inner impressions to a tape recorder, or to another person.  Eventually, even the slightest glimmer of imagination will be reinforced and amplified by consistent practice of this exercise.

If you are not yet able to easily imagine a location in which to meet your chosen expert, don’t worry.  Simply move forward to the imagined encounter with this person, whenever you are ready.

Your imaginary encounter may go exactly as planned, or there may be surprises in store for you.  Perhaps someone you weren’t expecting shows up.  Perhaps your chosen expert does not want to participate.  If no one appears in your mind’s imagination, ask for someone to come forward, and then wait.

When your imaginary guide appears, handle the encounter with as much politeness and respect as you would a real life encounter with a real person.  Do you feel comfortable in the presence of this expert?  Do you have the sense that the expert feels comfortable with you? 

Even if these guides are figments of your inner mind, you still need to be sure you are accessing a part of yourself that wants to promote only the best for you.

If you get any sense of discomfort between you, thank the expert for coming, and politely dismiss him or her.  Think of another expert you admire in your chosen field and create an imaginary encounter with that person.  You may even have to create a totally fictitious character to be your imaginary expert.

Once you have established a meeting with your chosen expert, mentally picture yourself and your visiting expert standing facing each other in an attitude of great respect.  Gently put your arms out and slowly remove the expert’s head from his or her body.  Since this is only an imaginary person or animal, the head should come off quite easily. 

Place the expert’s head above your own, facing the right way, and lower it over your own head.  Now believe that you are looking out at the world through the eyes of your chosen expert, hearing through the expert’s ears, smelling through the expert’s nose.

Take the time to allow the expert’s mind to slowly merge with your own mind.  Now gently pull the expert’s body towards you, and step into it.  Feel as if it fits you perfectly.  Feel that you have merged with the expert’s body and can feel and do the same things.

When you feel that you are actually in the expert’s body, notice what seems different to  you. Does the world look different in any way?  Do any of your attitudes feel different?  How does your body feel different?  Can you feel the confident attitude of the expert?  Memorize the sensation.

Focus on the differences you notice and start to talk about them out loud.  Spend at least five minutes doing this step.  When you have finished, gently step out of the borrowed imaginary body and carefully remove the expert’s head from you own.  Respectfully return the head and body to the expert.  Thank that person for allowing you to have this experience.

You can use the Expert’s Head technique to improve your skills at some desired activity, or to accelerate your ability to learn to do something you have never done before.

First spend a few weeks performing the Expert’s Head exercise daily to familiarize yourself with it.  Once you are accustomed to the process of donning the expert’s head, you are ready to use this technique to accelerate your skills development. 

First spend a few minutes performing the desired skill entirely in your mind.  Feel as if you are actually performing perfectly it and that you really know how to do it.  Then move to the Expert’s Head exercise, and spend about 10 –15  minutes, performing the activity in real life, but mentally be the character of the expert, wearing the expert’s head and body.

After about fifteen minutes, gently remove the expert’s head and step out of the expert’s body.  Thank the expert for the use of his or her body, mind and talent.  Ask the person to continue filling your mind with more of their expert knowledge and ability even when you are not practicing this exercise.

Before the experience starts to fade from your memory, spend a few minutes writing down or speaking out loud everything you can remember.  Write down or speak everything you can remember that was really different when you were in the expert’s mind and body, rather than as yourself.

When you wish to improve a particular skill, first spend about 15 minutes mentally doing it as yourself.  Then slip into the expert’s head and body to continue the exercise in real life for another fifteen to thirty minutes.  If you repeat this process about three times a day, you will experience a greatly accelerated ability to master the skills you desire.

Please realize that advice and knowledge received in this manner is not infallible.  Do not feel obligated to act on any advice received from your inner dialogue with your imagined guides unless you are absolutely convinced it is appropriate for you at this time. 

This technique can greatly increase access to your inner creativity and wisdom, but you will still need to make informed and reasoned decisions about what you do.

Kamis, 25 Maret 2010

Ambitions

I aim to become the president of my country. I have the object of becoming the greatest scientist. I will one day be the richest person in the world. I aim to and so goes the list of ambitions of people. Nobody remembers that the final goal for each one of us is going back to earth. Let us talk more about ambitions.

Are ambitions good or bad? This is difficult to answer, isn't it? To be an ambitious person must be very good. With ambitions a person strives to achieve a great feat. Few of us have very big ambitions and few very small. It all depends on our contentment. What will make us feel happy? What will make us feel worthy, and what will make us feel powerful? It's all about what we want from life. If you want money at any cost, you will compromise with all other values and try to make more money. But if your ambition is to become an honest person and live a God fearing life, no amount of money can attract you to do any wrongs.

Ambitions therefore depend upon our character, culture, mental makeup, outlook, values and so on. Till our ambitions don't trouble others it is ok. If by achieving our goals, we make others happy, that is still better. But if our ambitions hurt others, we must revisit our thinking and redefine our ambitions.

Rabu, 24 Maret 2010

Alternative Ways To Help Quit Smoking

The methods used to help a person quit smoking are as varied as smokers themselves. Some people find that they can quit smoking just by will power alone, going cold turkey and butting out forever. Others may find that in order to stop smoking they may have to enlist the help of others in the form of a support group or other network. Others turn to methods such as the patch or some types of chewing gum. As cultures begin to merge, however, there are more and more medical practices that have previously been unknown to Western science that may have many benefits to those who wish to stop smoking. Some of these alternative methods are discussed in this article.

Acupuncture: Acupuncture originated in China. It is the practice of inserting long, thin needles into various acupuncture points on the body, which is said to restore mental health and well being. As with many Far East ideas, acupuncture is concerned with restoring balance as a whole, rather than applying the health theories of the West to any one assigned area. The piercing points are areas which help to shock the body back into a healthy balance. Acupuncture is highly debated in medical circles, and studies have never conclusively proven that it is an effective treatment for anything at all. However, many patients who have undergone this treatment sweat by its results, and thus it may indeed be an effective tool when it comes to the battle to quit smoking. Addiction, after all, is in part a mental affliction, and thus if a patient believes that a treatment is working then it is possible that it is doing so. Additionally, acupuncture has been demonstrated to assist in the release of endorphins, the full effects of which on the body as a whole are still unknown to some degree.

Hypnosis: Another method that many smokers try to use when attempting to quit is hypnosis. It is vital that hypnosis be understood in its rightful context, rather than the societal myth. Hypnosis works along the same lines as subliminal messaging; by applying the power of suggestion to a subject who is concentrating on another matter, it is possible to affect the thinking processes of the brain. In this way, hypnosis can be used to curb the cravings that come with nicotine addiction and often lead the smoker to relapse.

There are also several changes to lifestyle that can be made in order to increase the amounts of dopamine found within the body. Dopamine is the active ingredient in Zyban, and levels of dopamine can be increased through a higher protein intake, stress reduction, and by taking vitamins and herbs such as Indian ginseng and magnesium.

Despite these methods and there levels of success, however, it is important to note that the key ingredient when it comes to smoking cessation is will power. No matter which other method you choose to assist you in ending the cravings and lessening the physical symptoms of withdrawal, sooner or later it is going to come down to your ability to say no to a cigarette that will ensure the end of the habit’s hold on your life.

Selasa, 23 Maret 2010

Alles was es über Herzinfarkt wissen muss!

Doch leider nur weniger wissen über diese Krankheit bescheid, oder wissen, wie sie zu reagieren haben. Dazu kommt noch, dass viele Menschen, auch in Deutschland, die Gefahr eines Herzinfarkts sehr unterschätzen. Dabei ereignen sich pro Jahr rund 300 000 Herzinfarkte in Deutschland. Die Überlebenschancen nach einem Herzinfarkt stehen dazu noch nur bei 50 Prozent.

Besonders Männer sind Herzinfarkt-gefährdet. Zu meist befinden sich die Männer zwischen dem Alter von 50 und 60 Jahren. Aber auch Frauen sind zwischen dem Alter von 60 und 70 Jahren Herzinfarkt-gefährdet. Natürlich gelten diese Zahlen nicht für alle, Infarkte sind auch bei jüngeren Menschen möglich und bekannt. Besonders Menschen mit den Risikofaktoren wie hohes Cholesterin, Diabetes, Bluthochdruck, Übergewicht und Rauchen sind gefährdet.

Wer folgende Risikofaktoren aufweist und im entsprechenden Alter ist, sollte sich die Gefahren des Herzinfarkts bewusst sein. Regelmäßige Arztbesuche schaden nie und sollten gemacht werden.  Ab dem 35. Lebensjahr zahlen die Krankenkassen einen jährlichen Vorsorge-Check.


Welche Symptome weisen einem auf ein Herzinfarkt Risiko hin?
Es gibt verschiedene Symptome, die einem ein Herzinfarkt andeutet, wird oft übersehen oder falsch gedeutet. So sollte man bei Übelkeit oder Schwindelgefühle zweimal nach checken, ob es sich nicht ums Herz geht. Auch starke Bauchschmerzen können ein Hinweis auf einen möglichen Herzinfarkt sein. Diese Schmerzen und Symptome können so plötzlich wieder verschwinden, wie sie gekommen sind, sollten aber nicht ignoriert werden. Sie sind meistens ernstzunehmende Anzeichen für ein Infarkt Risiko.

Die typischen und wichtigen Anzeichen kurz vor einem Herzinfarkt sind Druck- und Schmerzgefühl im Brustkorb – hinter dem Brustbein. 90 Prozent aller Herzinfarkt Betroffene empfinden unter diesen plötzlichen Schmerzen. Weite häufige Symptomen sind Schmerzen in der linken Schulter, seltener auch in der rechten Schulter,  Schmerzen in der linken Brust, Schmerzen im linken Arm oder Schmerzen im Unterkiefer. Typisch sind auch Vernichtungsgefühle, kalter Schweiß und Übelkeit.

Dank diesen und anderen Symptomen (Herzschmerzen, Druckgefühl in der Brust und allgemeine Brustschmerzen) kann man also einen bedrohlichen Herzinfarkt  rechtzeitig erkennen und agieren. Also, erste Anzeichen eines Herzinfarkts frühzeitig erkenne ist das A und O für die Vorkehrung.

Wie kommt es zum eigentlichen Infarkt?
Ein Herzinfarkt entsteht, wenn ein wichtiges Blutgefäß durch verkalkte Arterien (Arteriosklerose) verengt ist. Die starren Wände der Blutgefäße werden immer brüchiger, es lagern sich Blutplättchen an, die das Gefäß schließlich verstopfen. Der Herzmuskel stirbt ab. Dieser Vorgang muss nicht immer lange dauern, er kann blitzschnell in nur wenigen Minuten passieren.

Wer an einem Herzinfarkt leidet oder neben sich eine Person sieht, die an einem Herzinfarkt leidet, muss sofort reagieren, den jede Minute zählt.
Also sofort den Notdienst anrufen, Situation des Patienten und Ort dem Notdienst beschreiben. Gleichzeitig auch den Patienten beruhigen und sich zur Seite stehen. Nicht mit dem eigenen Auto in die Klinik fahren. Wertvolle Zeit zur Behandlung durch den Notfallarzt im Krankenwagen geht verloren.

Ein jeder Mensch der glaubt, Herzinfarkt gefährdet zu sein, kann aktiv dagegen was tun. Um sich vor Herzinfarkte schützen zu können muss er sein Lebensstil ändern. Am wichtigsten ist es, den Kreislauf wieder in Schwung zu bringen. Am besten macht man durch regelmäßige Bewegung und körperliche Aktivitäten. Auch muss auf eine gesunde und richtige Ernährung geachtet werden. Obst und Gemüse sind empfehlenswert, auch Olivenöl sehr gesund, dagegen sollte man auf Salz und Alkohol verzichten.

Senin, 22 Maret 2010

Allergie gegen Brot, wie geht denn das?

Was heißt eine Allergie gegen Brot? Existiert das überhaupt?
Die Antwort heißt ja! Aber nicht irgendein Brot!


Im Durchschnitt ist eine Person von 300 betroffen und muss sich als Zöliakie-Erkrankt outen, dabei sind Frauen häufiger befallen als Männer.
Zöliakie wird auch als "Überempfindlichkeit der Dünndarmschleimhaut gegen Gluten" bezeichnet oder einfach nur als " Glutenunverträglichkeit" oder "Glutenallergie". Die Glutenallergie im Säuglings- und Kindesalter wird Zöliakie, im Erwachsenenalter Sprue genannt.


Was ist Gluten überhaupt, und wo befindet sich Gluten?
Gluten ist ein Bestandteil, ein Klebereiweiß, das in mehrere Getreidesorten wiederzufinden ist. Gluten kommt vor allem in Weizen, Gerste, Roggen und Hafer vor. Weizen und andere Getreidesorten werden natürlich am meisten für Brot, Nudeln und sonstigem Rohstoff gebraucht. Daher die "Brot Allergie" Ausdruck.


Wie zeichnet sich die Allergie aus? Was sind seine Symptome?
Die klassischen Symptome einer Zöliakie sind durch die Verdauungsstörung bedingte chronische massige Durchfälle. Nachdem der Zöliakie Erkrankte Gluten zu sich genommen hat, kann dieser nach nur wenigen Tagen, manchmal nach wenigen Stunden an heftigen Bauchschmerzen und Schwächeanfälle leiden. Kinder haben oft keinen Appetit und leiden unter Gewichtsverlust und chronisches Untergewicht, wobei meistens ihr Wachstum zurückbleibt. Weitere Folgen bei Kinder sowie Erwachsene sind Eisenmangen, Kalziummangel und selten auch Blutmangel.


Wie stellt der Arzt die Diagnose Zöliakie?
Wer die oben benannten Symptome aufweist, hat mit einer Zöliakie Erkrankung zu rechnen. Eine sichere Feststellung der Zöliakie kann man feststellen durch eine Gewebeprobe des Dünndarms.


Wie lebt man mit der Zöliakie?
Die Antwort auf diese Frage scheint banal und doch unmöglich, aber mit der Zöliakie lässt es sich in der heutigen Zeit sehr gut leben. Auf den ersten Blick scheint es, als ob man auf mehrere alltäglicher Nahrung verzichten müsse, Brot, Pizza, Nudel, Panierte Schnitzel, Kuchen, Kekse, Bretzel, Pfannkuchen etc. Die Liste von Produkten, die aus Weizenmehl oder ähnlichem gemacht sind ist unendlich lang. Doch genau diese Produkte können auch ohne Weizenmehl gebacken, gekocht und zubereitet werden. Betroffene müssen sich zwar nun lebenslänglich glutenfrei ernähren, muss aber nicht gezwungener Weise auf all die Köstlichkeiten verzichten.


Weizen, Rogen, Hafer, Gerste und alle andere Glutenerhaltene Produkte können durch andere Naturalien ersetzt werden. Eine Liste von glutenfreie
alternative Getreidesorten sind folgende: Hirse, Mais, Reis, Amarant, Buchweizen, Quinoa, Sojabohnen, Teff, Kichererbsen, Kastanie und Kochbanane. Außerdem sind Kartoffeln, Sojabohnen, Tofu, Fleisch, Fisch, Eier, Milch, Obst, Gemüse und Eier erlaubt. Erst wer sich richtig informiert wird die Welt der Getreidesorten entdecken, die sich nicht nur auf Weizen und Roggen minimalisiert.


Die "Allergie gegen Brot" heißt nicht gezwungener Massen, dass man kein Brot essen darf. Richtig heißt es "Allergie auf Weizenbrot". Der Zöliakie Betroffene kann also Nudeln, Brot und Pizza essen!


Glutenunverträglichkeit ist ein chronisches Leiden, das in jedem Alter vorkommen kann, ist jedoch zu meist genetisch bestimmt. Die Funktion der Schleimhaut kann durch glutenfreie Nahrung wiederhergestellt und aufrechterhalten werden. Das Leben als Zöliakie Betroffene ist nicht wirklich schwer oder anders, nur leider ein bisschen teurer. In Reformhäuser, aber auch in machen Supermärkten kann man alles finden was man braucht. Der Betroffene muss eben mehr auf seine Nahrung aufpassen, was nicht negative ist. Also Guten Appetit!

Minggu, 21 Maret 2010

All The Money In The World Will Not Take Away Your Fears And Anxieties

All the money in the world will not take away your fears and anxieties. You can be the most successful person in your business, however your money and success will do nothing in getting rid of your stresses and anxieties. So what do you do to make your fears and anxieties to go away? Well, since money and fame are not the answers, then the best solution is to be smart in how you manage your fears. Here are some ways in how to manage your persistent fears and anxieties.

Take it one day at a time. Instead of worrying about how you will get through the rest of the week or coming month, try to focus on today. Each day can provide us with different opportunities to learn new things and that includes learning how to deal with your problems. Focus on the present and stop trying to predict what may happen next week. Next week will take care of itself.

Learn how to manage your fearful thoughts that may be difficult to manage. When experiencing a negative thought, read some positive statements and affirmations that help lift your spirits and make you feel better. Remember that your fearful thoughts may be exaggerated so balance these thoughts with realistic thinking and common sense.

Take advantage of the help that is available around you. If possible, talk to a professional who can help you manage your fears and anxieties. They will be able to provide you with additional advice and insights on how to deal with your current problem. By talking to a professional, a person will be helping themselves in the long run because they will become better able to deal with their problems in the future. Managing your fears and anxieties takes practice. The more you practice, the better you will become.

When managing your fears and anxieties do not try to tackle everything at once. The best solution is to break your fears or problems into a series of smaller steps. Completing these smaller tasks one at a time will make the stress more manageable and increases your chances of success.

Managing your fears and anxieties will take some hard work. Sooner or later, you will have to confront your fears and anxieties. Remember that all you can do is to do your best each day, hope for the best, and take things in stride. Patience, persistence, education, and being committed in trying to solve your problem will go along way in fixing your problems.

Sabtu, 20 Maret 2010

Alcohol Rehab

Alcohol abuse refers to the chronic consumption and craving for alcohol, so that it interferes in the normal social and economic functioning of the person. Alcohol Rehab tries to treat and bring back to normal victims of this condition.

The alcoholic is unable to stop his craving for drinking. He fails to complete his obligations at work or home. He undertakes activities that are dangerous in his condition, including drunk driving. He may encounter legal problems, and cannot and will not stop drinking despite personal, official and medical problems.

Alcoholism can be fatal. It affects the addict’s health in many ways. Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS) is an irreversible condition associated with excessive consumption of alcohol by pregnant women. It leads to physical and mental deficiencies and even fetal death. Another killer condition is Cirrhosis, caused by alcoholism and leading to liver failure and death.

Alcohol Rehab must be done carefully by trained medical professionals. It involves evaluation and management of acute alcohol withdrawal, treatment of nutritional deficiencies, detoxification and the maintenance of abstinence.

Medical treatment of alcoholism involves initially the management of alcohol withdrawal.  Treatment includes the use of thiamine and folate fed intravenously to prevent Wernicke Kosakoff syndrome (an eye disorder). Seizures must be treated with Benzodiazepines.

After medical management is over, a psychosocial Rehabilitation program must be undertaken. This includes educating the entire family of the patient, individual or group therapy, or even a spiritual ‘12 steps to sobriety’ program given by Alcoholics Anonymous.

There are some important points to remember. Supervised withdrawal is the first step and must not be hurried. Hurry can be fatal. A medically supervised detox program is the first step. Next step is to choose a Rehab center. Find a treatment center that deals not only with addiction but the holistic picture of psychosocial and legal problems.

The program must involve a major amount of therapy--counseling and occupational. Therapy or counseling is critical for alcohol treatment. Patients learn to resist alcohol use, replace drug-using activities with constructive and rewarding activities. They are asked to shun alcohol abusing company. They also relearn normal family and social living patterns.

Treatment involves continuous monitoring for alcohol use. Some people may require medication for their treatment, and this too must be monitored. Some may be suffering from mental problems that need special treatment. The treatment duration may vary with each case, but 3 months is a safe period for most treatment.

The main point is that there is no singular Rehab formula. The success of treatment depends on finding the right program and methods. Effective treatment must address the patient’s drug use and also related medical, social, psychological, vocational and legal problems.

The treatment may be long-term, involving periods of relapse. The crucial point is not to give up hope, but work patiently till you reach complete abstinence.

Jumat, 19 Maret 2010

Alcohol And Substance Abuse Will Not Take Away Your Fears

It is not easy to deal with our fears and anxieties however trying to avoid them through Alcohol or other substances will not work. Avoiding your fears and anxieties will not make them go away. Your fears and anxieties will always be there. The best way to deal with your fears is to find effective ways to overcome them. As a result, here are some techniques a person can use to help manage their fears and anxieties.

The first step is to learn to take it one day at a time. Instead of worrying about how you will get through the rest of the week or coming month, try to focus on today. Each day can provide us with different opportunities to learn new things and that includes learning how to deal with your problems. Focus on the present and stop trying to predict what may happen next week. Next week will take care of itself.

Seek help from God. You might of heard this before, however have you tried asking God for help? Praying and talking to God about your problem can be effective. Although the answers might not come to you right away, you can’t go wrong on relying on God. You never know how God will work in ones life. All you can do is to do your best each day, hope for the best, and take it in stride by using the help of God. God will help us through our problems if we ask him.

Remember that no one can predict the future with 100 Percent certainty. Even if the thing that you feared does happen there are circumstances and factors that you can’t predict which can be used to your advantage. For instance, let’s say at your place of work that you miss the deadline for a project you have been working on for the last few months. Everything you feared is coming true. Suddenly, your boss comes to your office and tells you that the deadline is extended and that he forgot to tell you the day before. This unknown factor changes everything. Remember: we may be ninety-nine percent correct in predicting the future, but all it takes is for that one percent to make a world of difference.

Another technique that is very helpful is to have a small notebook of positive statements that make you feel good. Whenever you come across an affirmation that makes you feel good, write it down in a small notebook that you can carry around with you in your pocket. Whenever you feel depressed or frustrated, open up your small notebook and read those statements. This will help to manage your negative thinking.

As a Layman, the important thing is to get the proper help by seeing a professional. Avoiding your problem through the use of alcohol or other substances will do nothing in the long run in fixing your problems. It will just make things worse. Managing your fear and anxieties will take some hard work. Be patience, persistent and stay committed in trying to solve your problem.

Kamis, 18 Maret 2010

Alcohol And Health Effects Of Alcohol On The Body

Alcohol and health effects of alcohol on the body can be short term or long term effects. The consumption of alcohol and health related problems can occur over a short time frame, while other conditions and long term effects of alcohol on the body may only happen following years of alcohol abuse.

Alcohol comes into direct contact with the mouth, throat, esophagus, stomach and intestines as well as being absorbed into the bloodstream. Health problems can begin as headaches, feeling nauseated, sore throat or indigestion. However, if alcohol abuse continues, these and other alcohol and health symptoms can develop into more serious illnesses and diseases.

Here are examples of short term health effects of alcohol on the body:

• Nausea, Vomiting, Dizziness, Hangovers - excessive alcohol consumption can result in the body trying to protect itself by getting rid of the alcohol and vomiting. Alcohol and health and the central nervous system are related since alcohol affects a person's sense of balance and orientation, leading to a feeling of nausea and/or dizziness. Hangovers are partly due to the body's dehydration caused by alcohol consumption, and hangover effects of alcohol on the body may be felt a few hours after consuming alcohol.

• Loss of Muscle Control - slurred speech is one of the effects of alcohol on the body. Impaired judgement and poor coordination are alcohol and health effects that can lead to falls and accidents.

• Adverse Interactions with Medications - alcohol is known to interact negatively with at least 100 medications. For example, antihistamines taken with alcohol can increase the drowsiness that this medication by itself can cause. Large doses of the painkiller acetaminophen taken together when consuming alcohol increases the risk of liver damage.

• Pregnancy Risks - alcohol can cause numerous birth defects, the most serious being fetal alcohol syndrome. Babies born with fetal alcohol syndrome will have physical abnormalities, mental impairment and problems with behavior. To avoid negative alcohol and health effects during pregnancy, do not drink alcohol during pregnancy as no one knows exactly how much alcohol causes birth deffects.

Because alcohol and health effects can involve many organs in the body, long-term heavy drinking puts you at risk for developing serious health conditions and illnesses. Here are examples of long term effects of alcohol on the body:

• Liver Inflammation and Cirrhosis of the Liver - liver inflammation symptoms include abnormal yellowing of the skin, eyeballs and urine, fever and abdominal pain. And in the case of cirrhosis, as many as one in five heavy drinkers will develop cirrhosis of the liver. Alcohol is especially harmful to the liver since the liver is needed to metabolize alcohol. Alcohol destroys liver cells, and it destroys the ability of the liver to regenerate new cells.

• Cancer - long term heavy drinkers increase their risk for certain forms of cancer such as cancer of the mouth, throat and esophagus and colon.

• Heart disease - long term heavy drinking increases a person's risk for developing high blood pressure and heart disease.

• Pancreaitis - long term heavy drinking can result in developing inflammation of the pancreas, called pancreaitis. The pancreas are needed for food digestion, and pancreaitis symptoms include severe abdominal pain and weight loss. Pancreaitis can be life-threatening.

Additional long term negative alcohol and health effects on the body include damage to the brain, nerve damage, bleeding in the esophagus, erectile dysfunction in men, insomnia and depression. If you'd like to learn more about alcoholism stages and warning signs, there are proven resources available that can help. It is never too late to begin recovery from alcohol addiction.

Copyright 2006 InfoSearch Publishing

Rabu, 17 Maret 2010

Alcohol And Drug Rehabilitation: A Historical Perspective

Every year, the stress of daily life seems to grow more complicated. Cell phones constantly ring; palm-pilots overflow with demanding schedules. Personal lives become complex and unmanageable. The self becomes lost within this whirlwind of relationships, commitments and deadlines. Eventually, pressures become overbearing for both body and mind. This is a major reason why personal health and fitness are so crucial. However, health food and personal trainers are incapable of reaching deep-rooted problems. Addictions are common manifestations of society’s never-ending stress. Luckily, inadequate methods are things of the past. Dependency issues are finally understood, and treatment is possible. A healthy life is now truly attainable.

Rehabilitation of substance abuse strictly relies upon individualism. “Text book cases” and generalized treatments proved inadequate. Everyone is an individual with a different life. Likewise, addiction begins and affects each person differently. Successful treatments first address the pain of each person’s unique experiences; then, they continue by restoring the individuality inevitably lost by addiction. The desperation of feeding addiction usually dulls a person’s unique personality and interests. As healing takes effect, people regain the very identity that made them individuals in the first place.

Dramatic advancements have greatly improved treatment programs/centers. Today, quality rehabilitation centers provide caring, individualized, and holistic treatment. However, memories of past rehabilitation centers and the continuation of outdated programs deter many from a better life. Incorrect treatments of the past proved not only ineffective but also detrimental. An awareness of past programs will assist in the identification of an ideal center.

Past Treatments:
For the majority of the nineteenth century addiction and its treatment was extremely misinterpreted. Largely influenced by Prohibition movements and religiously fueled treatment programs, ideas of addiction as a moral weakness continued until the 1970s. The first modern treatment facility was developed in Cleveland in the late 30’s/early 40’s. When the American Medical Association called addiction a “disease” in 1955, the still existing “medical model” to treatment developed. While “moral model” advocates locked addicts away to prevent the feared debasement of society, proponents of the “medical model” institutionalized people to be “cured.”  However, “medication” merely numbed addiction and destroyed an individuals’ identity. An atmosphere of hopelessness and intimidation permeated prison-like quarters. Abusive and unsanitary conditions were common. While these methods failed to treat addiction, they merely intensified the damage that addiction had initiated.

As a “social model” view of addiction developed, community-based programs slowly appeared across the country. Medication became eliminated from treatment programs. No longer viewed as a chemical ailment, addiction became attributed to environmental causes. Finally factors such as family issues and peer pressure were brought to attention. The civil rights movement outlawed abuse, and caring approaches developed. Since negative surroundings were believed to be the cause of addiction, treatment focused on providing positive social settings to bring counteracting effects. Programs became group focused. The actual concept of rehabilitation centers appeared, and out-patient programs developed. Nevertheless, this sole focus on group therapy also proved unable to meet specific needs. The individual still became lost amidst “treatment.” Opportunities to talk about past experiences increased, but counseling and self-exploration remained largely reserved to group sessions. While conditions were no longer dangerous, irrelevant and intimidating activities, such as the cleaning toilets, remained. Although a more humane version of the “medical model” and group-focused “social model” exist today, they still fail to accomplish complete treatment. Permanent recovery is never assured.

Treatment for Today:
In 1985 New York became one of the first to combine addiction and mental illness into one treatment. More and more instances of joined treatments appeared in the 1990s. Now in the twenty-first century, although both the “medical” and “social” models of substance treatment still continue, so does evolution. Modernized facilities provide people with unmatchable, long-lasting effects. Grounded in the most up-to-date research, progressive programs stay directly aligned with practices of good health. Past treatments have helped some. But as the combined approach of individualized and holistic methodologies galvanizes the concept of rehabilitation, treatment is not only more effective than ever, but everyone can also achieve outstanding success. Taking California Drug and Alcohol Treatment by storm, evolution has empowered rehabilitation to new frontiers. Wellness can now thrive in all aspects of life.

Finally, rehabilitation not only recognizes, but also places full attention on patient individuality. While medicine and community may be utilized, programs now use a wide variety of approaches to achieve ideal individualized treatment plans. Beginning with the process of detox, psychiatrists, neuropharmacologists, and nurses provide one-to-one twenty-four-hour assistance. Addiction causes the body to rely upon poison. Highly skilled professionals stand ready for both the effects of substance withdrawal and arising individual complications. As detox enables the body to return to normal functioning, attentive individualized care makes this necessary time as short and painless as possible.

After drug detox frees the body of its dependency, the mind is ready to start its healing journey. Individualized and holistic methods are critical. Programs based on team counseling offer numerous one-on-one sessions from a variety of counselors and constantly revised personal therapy programs. As psychotherapy and hypnotherapy enable the crucial awareness of behaviors and repressed memories, a wide variety of specialized therapies enable further individualized care. Services include marriage/family, spiritual, life purpose, nutritional, image, yoga, and music/art therapy. No longer forced to share personal matters in a group setting, people also benefit from this array of therapy services. With holistic programs, catered to the individual, treatment becomes an unquestionable reality.

Weaving all components of life into recovery, the complete healing of a person’s entire existence can be achieved. During the period of intensive counseling, physical attention furthers the simultaneous mind and body rehabilitation process. Physical training, massage/bodywork, and acupuncture treatment prove extremely effective. While hypnotherapy also works to reduce anxiety, the lulling effects of a luxurious and an outdoor setting rejuvenate the spirit. Eventually, this holistic individualized approach reconnects the body and mind into harmonious wholeness.

Finally treatment is able to eliminate the devastating effects of alcohol and drug abuse, and the everyday concerns of prescription drug addition no longer have to remain part of daily life. The historical development of treatment has come a long way. Recovery does not have to bring further complications or merely touch surface issues.  Treatment has the ability to eradicate problems at their source and restore each person’s individual existence to complete health. It is about time.

Selasa, 16 Maret 2010

Alcohol Addiction Treatment Program - 3 Alcoholism Treatment Option Steps

An alcohol addiction treatment program consists of three general alcoholism treatment option steps. These three steps are intervention, detoxification and rehabitation.

Many persons with a drinking problem do not see or acknowledge that they have a problem with alcohol abuse. Intervention used in an alcohol addiction treatment program used to be more confrontational since problem drinkers would be confronted about their excessive drinking and threatened with consequences if they did not begin treatment.

Today, the more effective alcoholism treatment option consists of caring and understanding counseling and intervention. Studies have found that more people begin an alcohol addiction treatment program when family members or employers are honest with them and try to help the drinker see that alcohol abuse is adversely affecting their health and lives in many ways.

Family or friends may need to help start the process of drinking problem recognition by reading relevant books on the subject to become better informed, by contacting their healthcare professional or by locating the nearest Alcoholics Anonymous or similar group.

An alcohol addiction treatment program intervention is a structured process where a group of family members, friends or co-workers get together in a caring way to communicate their concerns about a problem drinker's behavior. Done correctly, intervention has the objective of moving the person (and those who are part of the problem drinker's life) out of crisis mode and into addressing the addiction. Without the problem drinker recognizing and acknowledging that he or she has a drinking problem, there can be no effective and lasting alcoholism treatment option.

Here are the three main alcohol addiction treatment program steps:

1. Intervention - this is the initial alcoholism treatment option whereby the drinking problem is recognized and acknowledged by the drinker and perhaps family members or employer as well. Once the alcohol problem is recognized, alcohol consumption is stopped for those persons that are alcohol dependent.

If the person is a problem drinker, moderate drinking may be successful. Many alcoholics at first will not acknowledge that their drinking is out of control, and moderation can often be a successful way to deal with the drinking problem. If moderation works, the drinking problem is solved. If it doesn't work, then the person is usually ready to try abstinence. Because alcoholism affects the people closely related to the problem drinker, education and treatment for family members through counseling is often necessary.

2. Detoxification - this phase of an alcohol addiction treatment program usually takes from 4 to 7 days. The more alcohol a person has been drinking each day, the higher the likelihood the person will develop alcohol withdrawal symptoms when they stop drinking.

Alcohol withdrawal symptoms can range from annoying and uncomfortable to serious and even life-threatening. Withdrawal symptoms generally begin within 12 hours of the last alcohol consumption and will be the maximum in two or three days. The person may need to stay at the hospital for medical observation.

In a medically supervised environment, withdrawal from alcohol can be done safely, and medications can be used as needed to relieve withdrawal symptoms. Other medical problems that may exist increase the likelihood of developing severe withdrawal symptoms. For example, blood clotting and liver problems are often found in heavy drinkers, and serious symptoms such as convulsions, fever or delirium tremens can develop.

3. Rehabilitation - recovery from alcoholism should include support for the problem drinker once the detoxification alcoholism treatment option phase is completed to help maintain alcohol abstinence. This important recovery support will likely include counseling, nursing and medical care within these kinds of programs. Alcoholism disease education and alcohol effects on the body should be part of this alcoholism treatment option and rehab.

An alcohol addiction treatment program can be an inpatient or outpatient program. Medications are sometimes prescribed in alcoholism treatment to help prevent relapses. Naltrexone will reduce the desire for alcohol. Antabuse is another drug that is used in alcoholism treatment. It functions by producing unpleasant side effects if any alcohol is consumed within fourteen days after the drug is taken. Counseling or support groups are often needed on a long-term basis to help maintain sobriety.

Alcoholism and alcohol abuse can become life-threatening if not treated. It is never too late to begin the process of intervention, detoxification and rehabilitation to help a problem drinker regain control of their health and their lives.

If you'd like to see what alcoholism treatment option facilities exist, you can search online for a USA alcohol abuse treatment center that's located near you. If recovery from alcohol becomes a priority in your life or the life of someone you care about, seek an alcohol addiction treatment program that can provide the caring and professional alcoholism treatment that the problem drinker truly deserves.

Copyright 2006 InfoSearch Publishing

Senin, 15 Maret 2010

Afraid Of Losing? If You Are, Then You Already Did!

Gambling is not the issue here. A person who thinks that gambling is his way out of a wretched life loses just the same. A person who always relies on luck and uses gambling as a source of income also loses big time.

This type of person views gambling as a risk worth taking regardless of the effect it has on him. Gambling makes a person lazy and reinforces belief on easy money. Deep within that person, he is losing part of his self-respect every time he engages in gambling.

Now, put yourself in the shoes of a neophyte salesperson. First time salespersons usually have this kind of dilemma: to be or not to be; to approach or not to approach the customer. Your fear of not being able to sell or get an order makes you back out even before you try.

If you do not make the act of approaching the customer for an order, you already lost it. But, if you do, you still have a good chance of getting an order or learning a lesson. Of course, it depends on your convincing power of salesmanship. You have to be honest regarding your products or services. Do not promise what you cannot deliver. Deliver more than what you promise. These are just some of the steps towards establishing a lasting relationship with your customer.

Let us examine in detail the basis for your inaction, which is essentially the basis of your fear. What is your excuse for not approaching the customer or for not getting that order?

Fear can make you lose an order. It can stop you on your tracks as you approach the customer. Fear can stop you from doing an action because it can overwhelm you and make you afraid of taking a “no” for an answer.

Actually, there is probably an underlying reason for your anxiety, one that links to the fear of losing your job. If your performance is below par, expect to be fired. Your performance has to be above par. To be able to do this, get rid of the fear of losing. Adopt a mindset that echoes, “I can and will get that order.”

Let us take the perspective of an aspiring businessperson. A first time entry into any business venture normally results to nervousness due to fear of losing his capital. This fear escalates especially when the capital comes from hard-earned savings. Seeing hard earned savings go to waste as a result of a bankrupt business can drive anyone crazy. If this happens, he will have to start saving again; that is, if he is still young and has the physical stamina to do so.

The fear of losing is just one side of reality. Let us check out the other side, which emphasizes the courage to win.

Again, everything begins in the mind. Maintain the desire to win. Encourage your mind to nurture the courage to win. Take some calculated risks. Be optimistic while keeping your feet on the ground. Be creative and think out of the box.

If you continue delaying your plans to achieve success because of your fears, you lose valuable time that could otherwise have been used for fruitful ventures. If you eventually decide to scrap or abandon your plans, you lose the chance of a lifetime. Time lost is irreversible.

So, are you willing to confront your fears?

Minggu, 14 Maret 2010

Advantages of Using The Absolutely Right Self Improvement Techniques

Take the time to become familiar with the different “self help” and “self improvement” techniques that are available.  Using the right techniques can make the difference between “breaking through” and not.  Consider a source of self help and self improvement practices that gives a wide enough choice to find what’s right for you.  Here are some of the benefits you can enjoy with the right techniques.

Discover your life purpose!  Why are you here on this earth?  Is there a specific purpose for your life?  What about all the other people?   Do you think life events are due to accident and chance?

Find out who you really are and what you really want!  Are you actually leading the life that is the true you?  Or are your circumstances living unconsciously thru you?

Eliminate and manage your fears!  If you could stand back and view yourself on the “stage of your life” could you see where your fears come from and act in a different manner?

Manage unseen forces in your relationships.  Many people repeat the same issues in a series of relationships.  Has this happened to you?  Use the right technique to learn what is really going and get past it!

Understand and cope with confusing and changing times!  Have certain puzzling events unfolded in your life?  Would you like to know if there is a reason for their appearance?

Learn to make decisions and not worry about mistakes!  Enhance your instincts and intuition so you can better rely on your (developed) judgement.

Develop confidence in yourself, based on better knowing who you truly are.

Design your own roadmap to success!  Base your plans on a “higher “ level of knowledge.

Learn the Three Step Formula to deliberate attraction..

Learn to repair negative experiences and emotions that are holding you back.

Learn why you may be repeatedly attracting negative events, people, and circumstances.


Learn why most people are “programmed” for unhappiness and what to do about it!

Learn what keeps us stuck in the same “life patterns” when we think we’re changing!

Are you actually responsible for everything that happens to you or are their actual  “external events”?

Learn to release limiting beliefs and emotions known as “blocks”!

If you desire to experience any of these benefits in your life, find the self help tools and techniques that will help you to do so!  For a helpful FREE REPORT, see below.

Sabtu, 13 Maret 2010

Adult ADD And The Art Of Grocery Shopping

One of my greatest struggle with sticking to a budget, is that I always overspend what I budget on food. Here are some of my tips to help an Adult with ADD when going Grocery Shopping:

1. Write a menu of what you want to eat for the week. Make sure to include breakfast, lunch, and snacks. There are software products available to help adults with ADD who are more visual thinkers.

2. Based on the menu create a list of what you will need to prepare the items on your menu.

3. Look in your cabinets and refrigerator, for items that are on your list, remove those items from your list. If you go the supermarkets to buy cleaning products or toiletries, you will need to check your bathroom, closets, and if you are like me anywhere else in the house where you put these items. Add items that you are running low on, on to the list.

4. Can you afford the items that are on your list? This will be difficult to determine if this is the first time that you have set a limit for yourself, or if grocery shopping is new to you. Once you have shopped a couple of times with a set limit, you will understand whether your food budget is realistic, or if you will have to make changes to your limit or what you buy. A lot of adults with ADD like to use online services that will deliver the groceries to you. This can be helpful for several reasons; it will total up all you purchases before you make them, it reduce the time of a mundane task, and it helps to control impulse buying.

5. If you are planning to go out shopping, make sure you eat a proper meal before hand. This helps you keep a clear head and reduce impulse buying, by not buying things that you are craving because you are hungry.

6. Have you checked circulars, newspapers or the Internet for coupons for the products that are on your list? This can be dangerous because you might also be tempted to buy additional items that you do not really need.

7. Before you head out decide if you want to go to one store or more than one store. While you can save money by going to additional stores, I would not recommend it. First the additional money and time that you spend traveling could negate any savings that you get. Second it adds a lot of complexity to a task that should be done as simply as possible.

Jumat, 12 Maret 2010

Adopting a New Creed to Turn Your Life Around.

Copyright 2006 Emmanuel Segui

How many times in your life have you signed your name to an agreement that bound you to do something?

Even though you put great value on your personal freedom, and you would be wary of agreeing to do anything that would jeopardize it, you have committed yourself to certain things where a penalty was involved if you did not do them.

Even when you opened your bank account, and applied for your insurance, you agreed to be bound by certain specific conditions. Probably right now much of your use of money, and your personal and vocational life, is influenced by such agreements. You signed your name to such binding agreements because it was the only way you could have or do what you considered necessary in your life

Sign your life away!

These are all agreements you have made with other people. But what about yourself?

Have you ever made an agreement with yourself, to do something for yourself? This is the most important kind of an agreement you can make, and I propose that you make one right now. This agreement involves not parts of your life, but rather your whole life, and I believe that you are ready for it.

You are ready now to understand a new creed of living. And you are ready to accept and adopt this creed.

This is the creed of "do," the positive creed of action, performance, production and accomplishment. It is the opposite of the creed of "do not," the negative creed of rejection, procrastination, fear and failure.

This positive creed says "do, rather than do not"; "do, rather than talk about it"; "do, rather than wish"; "do, rather than wait."

Are you willing to embrace this creed? I am sure that it wouldn't take more than a little self-influence for you to do so. And I am sure that you are willing to say that your attitude toward it is that it is a good creed, and a right creed, for you.

But like any creed, this one says a lot in a few words, so I want you to consider the "fine print" that is in back of those words before you go all the way and say it is your creed.

Furthermore, I am sure you will agree with me when I say the acceptance of the creed should make a "noteworthy" impression on your subconscious mind. You will start out with a good attitude, of course, but the objective agreed upon should be to make this creed a good habit. So let's consider what is implied in the "fine print."

You will be a person who has veered away from the normal track and from living the typical, ultra-conventional life.

You will be a person who is always on the productive, progressive track, and that is abnormal!

This "do" creed, then, means that you will live abnormally, or above the normal. You will travel only on the positive side of the road of life. You will live immoderately, by going "all the way." Knowing the true significance of this creed, are you now willing to ally yourself with it?

You have not the slightest reason to be hesitant about your decision. This is the creed of a person who has established his own importance to himself. But there is still another vital reason for its being your creed. The creed of "do" is made up of the kind of stuff that makes subconscious self-influence clear and certain. You will have the highest score of "noteworthy" impressions on your subconscious by acting according to the creed. The creed will make your subconscious the kind of a partner you want it to be.

Are you adopting the creed? You are, so say "yes"!

Say it aloud, so that conscious will of yours blinks a bit from the reverberations and so that your affirmation is recorded on that subconscious camera as the brightest impression ever!

This is the turning point.

Kamis, 11 Maret 2010

Adolescent Anger Management Strategies

Adolescent anger management is becoming more prominent in our society. Traditionally, children who enter this last acute phase of bodily and mental development can go through some rough times. As kids enter their preteen and then their teenage years, chaos can ensue at times for everyone involved. A child or young adult may feel that his or her body and mind are out of control occasionally, and the parents and teachers who supervise children at this age may tend to agree. Anger can spring out of nowhere to challenge innocent requests and reasonable expectations. Yet kids between the age of twelve and sixteen sometimes react in unpredictable ways, surprising those around them and even themselves and requiring the intervention of adolescent anger management strategies.

Today’s teens face even greater pressures than those of the past. By age eighteen, most have witnessed thousands of murders on television and video games. Some are involved in violent or illegal gang activity. Others come from broken homes where domestic violence and substance abuse are the norm. By the time they start going through puberty, their entire existence may seem out of their control, and they may grow increasingly enraged, acting out their anger in antisocial ways that require adolescent anger management.

Adolescent Anger Management and Juvenile Delinquents

Sadly, many teens experience frustrations that drive them to vent anger toward people or things, breaking civil laws. This type of behavior often leads to incarceration, or at the very least, intervention by parents, teachers, law enforcement officials, and juvenile experts who attempt to train children how to respond in age-appropriate ways. Adolescent anger management programs teach kids individually or in peer groups how to identify negative feelings, work through them in the right kind of ways, seek help when needed, and practice more mature behaviors.

During periods of time spent at juvenile detention centers, teens involved in adolescent anger management programs can learn how to improve their behavior in socially acceptable ways. Therapists can help to point out alternative attitudes and behaviors to teens who have never seen positive responses to everyday irritations modeled for them by responsible adults. They may be able to learn directly from the therapist how to manage difficult feelings, and they can read resource materials or visit websites like anger-management-information.com (site is not complete yet) for more information about this condition, and how to address it. They will find others like themselves who are learning how to get along with people and accept the situations that cannot be changed.

Community Adolescent Anger Management Programs

If you have or work with a teenager that is struggling with angry outbursts and a poor attitude, get in touch with a teacher or psychologist at your child’s school or a community social services organization that can direct you to self-help resources or a local adolescent anger management group that might be willing to admit your child. Letting unresolved anger fester or continue to be displayed in dangerous ways can lead to serious consequences. Get your teen the help that is needed for coping with this behavioral disorder.

Rabu, 10 Maret 2010

Addiction Treatment Is A Choice

People become victims of substance abuse for different and often inscrutable reason. But whatever these reasons are, it is undeniable that this problem wrecks havoc in the lives of its victims and the society. It is proven that there is a connection between the increasing crime rate and substance use. Other than being perpetrators of crimes, people under the influence of substances damage their own health. Cases of drug overdose, alcohol-driven accidents, and infections are common in emergency rooms, hospitals, and sadly, even morgues. But there is still hope for the family, friends, and the addicted individuals. Different addiction treatment programs are launched yearly by the government and other civilian organizations in hopes of promoting a healthier and peaceful society.

But addiction treatment is a delicate issue. Substance dependents take a long time before accepting that they have a problem. Denial often delays seeking for treatment which often results in growing severity in the dependency. Even family and friends ignore warning signs of drug abuse or alcoholism in their loved ones because they simply can't accept that the problem exists. Dependents and their families often think that they can solve or stop the habit by themselves. However, substance dependency is not just an excessive physical craving; it is also a psychological problem. Without professional help, the chances of recovery and avoiding relapse are very low to none.

Admittedly, there is no permanent cure for addiction. Recovery and treatment are continuos and life-long processes. But there are several ways to considerably lighten the burden. Support groups like Alcoholics Anonymous, Narcotics Anonymous, and community organizations with treatment programs guide dependents to recovery. In joining these groups, dependents get the chance to relate and share experiences with persons battling the same problem. These groups are also facilitated by people who are experts in substance abuse counseling. A common practice in these groups is the surrender of the dependents to Higher Powers which guide them through the process. Dependents who undergo this form of recovery describe it as deeply spiritual and life-changing.

If surrendering oneself to another is not the dependent's cup of tea, there is another treatment program that banks on individual power. The SMART Recovery addiction treatment rejects the Higher Power but instead urges individuals to find within themselves the strength to overcome their problem. The treatment is abstinence-based - the individual has the competency to choose a better life over the substance he is addicted to.

No matter what form of addiction treatment a dependent follows, it is important to emphasize that no one becomes sober overnight. It is also important to stress that relapse is still a strong possibility. Substance abuse programs are only there to help, not to cure. Having a better life is a choice dependents have to make for themselves.

Selasa, 09 Maret 2010

Addiction to Talking

There is an old joke about people who talk a lot: “Do you know the 12-Step program for people who talk a lot? On and On Anon!”

The joke recognizes that fact that incessant talking is a common addiction.

Non-stop talking is about using others for attention and approval because of not giving oneself enough attention and approval. The talker is not actually offering anything to the listener. Instead, the talker, in going on and on with a monologue, is pulling energy from the listener. People who end up listening to a talker go on and on are often caretakers who are afraid to hurt the talker by disengaging or by telling the truth about their boredom.

Talkers are often needy people who attempt to assuage their emptiness by trapping people into listening to them. For example, I’ve seen people telling a bank teller their life story, while the trapped teller doesn’t know how to disengage without being impolite. The problem is that one of the reasons these people are without friends is that no one wants to be with them. It’s draining to be at the other end of a needy person who uses talking as a way to fill up.

If you are addicted to talking, perhaps you believe that you are being interesting when you go on and on about yourself. However, you might reconsider the truth of this belief if you find that many people avoid you. Most people will not tell you the truth – that they feel tired, drained and trapped in your presence, and bored by your talking. Not wanting to offend you, they just stay away rather speak their truth. They don’t answer the phone when they know it’s you, and they find any excuse to not spend time with you. It’s not that they don’t like you – it’s that they don’t want to be used by you to fill up your emptiness.

HEALING YOUR ADDICTION TO TALKING

Imagine that you have a child within you – your feeling self - who feels very alone. This child feels alone because you are not paying attention to him or her. Every time you trap someone into listening to you, it is as if you are handing this inner child away for adoption. You want someone else to attend to and approve of this child instead of you accepting this responsibility.

The very fact of doing this is an inner abandonment and is creating the aloneness that is at the heart of all addictions. By expecting others to listen to you when you don’t listen to yourself, you are giving the child within a message that he or she is not important to you. When you do not take the time to attend to your own feelings and needs, you are creating inner neediness and emptiness. This inner emptiness is like a vacuum that attempts to suck caring from others. Yet no matter how often others do listen to you, it never really fills you. This is because only you can give your own inner child what he or she needs.

If you were to take some time each day to have a dialogue, either out loud or in writing, with the part of you who so needs to be heard, you would discover that you can fill your own emptiness. In addition, if you practice imagining a loving spiritual presence holding you, loving you, listening to you and guiding you, you will no longer feel alone.

As long as you believe that it is someone else’s job to fill you, you will not take the time to learn how to fill yourself. As long as you believe that it is okay to trap others and use them to fill yourself, you will continue your talking addiction. Only when you get that it is not loving to yourself or others to expect them to take care of your own inner child – your own feelings and needs - will you start to take on that responsibility.

While you might not believe that you can fill yourself better than others can, you will not know until you try. My personal experience is that when my intention is to take loving care of myself and to fill myself with the Love that is God, I feel happy and peaceful. When you choose to take responsibility for meeting your own needs instead of abandoning yourself to others, you will never feel alone.

Senin, 08 Maret 2010

Addiction to Self-Judgment

“I’m such a jerk. How could I have said that?”
“I’m a looser. I’ll never get anywhere.”
“I’m so stupid. I should have learned this by now.”
“I don’t fit in. I don’t belong with these people.”
“I’ll never be good enough. I’ll never do it right enough.”
“I’m permanently emotionally damaged. I’ll never be okay.”
“No one could love me. I’m not lovable.”

…and so on and so on.

Are you aware of your self-judgments? Are you aware of how often you judge yourself as bad, wrong, or inadequate? Are you aware of how you end up feeling as a result of your self-judgments?

In my counseling work with people, I find that self-judgment is one of the major causes of fear, anger, anxiety and depression. Yet most people don’t realize that these painful feelings are the result of their own thoughts, their own self-judgments. Most of the time, when I ask an anxious client why they are feeling anxious, they tell me that it’s because of something that happened to them. They usually believe that an event or a person caused their anxiety. Yet when I ask them what they are thinking that might be causing their anxiety, they will tell me a self-judgment such as, “I’ll never get this right,” or they are projecting their own judgment onto me and telling themselves, “Margaret doesn’t like me,” or “Margaret is getting impatient with me.” When they judge themselves or make up that I’m judging them, they get anxious. There is nothing actually happening that is causing their anxiety, other than their own thoughts.

Pointing out to them that they are causing their anxiety with their self-judgment doesn’t not necessarily stop the judgment. This is because self-judgment is often an addiction. An addiction is a habitual behavior that is intended to protect against pain. What is the pain that self-judgment is intended to protect against?

Generally, the hope of self-judgment is to protect against rejection and failure. The false beliefs are that, “If I judge myself, then others won’t judge me and reject me. I can be safe from others’ judgment by judging myself first,” or “If I judge myself, I can motivate myself to do things right and succeed. Then I will feel safe and be loved and accepted by others.”

However, just as a child does far better in school with encouragement than with criticism, so do we as adults. Criticism tends to scare and immobilize us. Instead of motivating us, it often creates so much anxiety that we get frozen and become unable to take appropriate action for ourselves. More self-judgment follows the lack of action, which results in more anxiety and immobilization, until we create a situation where we are completely stuck and miserable.

The way out of this is to become aware of the feelings of fear, anxiety, anger or depression and then ask yourself, “What did I just tell myself that is creating this feeling?” Once you become aware of the self-judgment, you can then ask yourself, “Am I certain that what I am telling myself is true?” If you are not 100% certain that what you are telling yourself is true, you can ask your higher, wise self or a spiritual source of wisdom, “What is the truth?” If you are really open to learning about the truth, the truth will pop into your mind, and it will be much different than what you have been telling yourself.

For example, “I’m such a jerk. How could I have said that?” becomes “We all mess up at times. It’s okay to make mistakes - it’s part of being human. Making a mistake does not mean that you are a jerk.” When we open to the truth, we will discover a kind and compassionate way of speaking to ourselves, a way that makes us feel loved and safe rather than anxious, angry or depressed.

Addictions are always challenging to resolve, and an addiction to self-judgment is no exception. So be easy on yourself, and don’t judge yourself for judging yourself! It will take time and dedication to become aware of your self-judgments and learn to be kind toward yourself, but the end result is so worth the effort!

Minggu, 07 Maret 2010

Addiction to Perfection

The following email was sent to me by Karen, a member of our website:

“For no obvious reason this morning, I was feeling anxious and depressed. I looked at it and realized that the false belief creating all this was that I have to be perfect in order for me to allow myself to feel happiness. Yet, there are so many conditions for me to be perfect that it is almost impossible to achieve. Still, I have driven myself to be ‘perfect’ sometimes and discovered it that the ensuing happiness lasts about 2 seconds and I am exhausted.

“Lately, procrastination is somehow wrapped up in this conundrum too. Maybe I don't even try things because I know if it's not done perfectly I won't value it anyway. Most of my life, my critically inspired drive propelled me to achieve some amazing things (including opening my own business in L.A.). Somehow, I feel that if I don't criticize and punish myself then I'll never go anywhere or do anything. Yet the truth is, right now, I'm not really productive. There must be another way!”

Needing to be perfect is a form of control. The wounded, critical part of us believes that, “If I am perfect (whatever that means!) then people will like me, love me, admire me, approve of me, pay attention to me, or validate me. Then I will feel worthy. I can control how people feel about me by being perfect.” The need to control how people feel about us comes from making others responsible for defining our worth. The false belief is that if someone likes you, then you are worthy, and then you can be happy. But, as Karen said, “the ensuing happiness last about 2 seconds and I am exhausted.” Trying to be perfect is exhausting and the good feelings are very short-lived.

In addition, having to be perfect in order to gain approval often leads to procrastination. The fear of disapproval and failure if you are not perfect can be so great that it stops you from taking the action you need to take. Judging yourself to get yourself to do things “perfectly” often backfires, leading to paralysis instead of creativity and productivity, as it has with Karen.

Karen states that, “There must be another way!” There is, indeed, another way - a much better way.

When you decide to define your own worth instead of handing that crucial responsibility to others, you will stop worrying about what others think and feel about you. The problem is that, for most of us, our parents and other adults defined our worth when we are young. Of course we saw adults as having the authority to do that. As we grew older, we gave our peers the authority to define us. But at some point, we need to shift from others having the authority to define our worth to our own higher, wise self or spiritual Guidance having the authority.

In addition, we need to shift from defining our worth based on external qualities to our worth being based on internal, intrinsic soul qualities. As long as your worth is based on performance, you will worry about results. But when your worth is based on your intrinsic qualities of caring, compassion, goodness, empathy, and joyfulness, then it is never on the line regarding your performance. This will free you to create and produce with freedom and joy, knowing that you can make all the mistakes in the world and still be worthy. Perfection never comes into the picture when your performance is a joyful expression of your intrinsic worth, rather than a form of controlling what others think and feel about you.

When you open to learning with a higher authority about your true, intrinsic worth, and embrace the beauty and wonder of your beautiful essence, you will stop thinking about perfection, and you will stop thinking about performance and what others think about you. You will know that you are already “perfect” in your essence, and that there is nothing to prove.

When you know your worth as intrinsic rather than based on your performance, life becomes so much easier and less tiring. Instead of your addiction to perfection immobilizing you, you are free to fully express yourself and manifest your gifts and talents. Expressing yourself creatively and productively becomes fun rather than fearful!

Sabtu, 06 Maret 2010

Addiction to Complaining

Complaining is a way of life for some people. It was certainly a way of life for my mother. I don’t remember a day going by without her complaining, endlessly. I don’t think I ever heard a word of gratitude out of my mother’s mouth. No matter how good things were, she would manage to find something wrong. No matter how perfect I was – and God knows I tried to be perfect! – she always found something wrong with me, as well as with my father.

Over the years of counseling others, I’ve noticed that some people start every session with a complaint. They can’t seem to help it. Like my mother, they are addicted to complaining.

Why do people complain? What is it they want or hope for when they complain?

People who complain are generally people who have not done the emotional and spiritual work of developing a loving, compassionate inner adult self. They are operating as a wounded child in need of love, attention and compassion. Because they have not learned to give themselves the attention and compassion they need, they seek to get these needs met by others. Complaining is a way they have learned to attempt to get this. They use complaining as a form of control, hoping to guilt others into giving them the attention, caring and compassion they seek.

Complaining is a “pull” on other people. Energetically, complainers are pulling on others for caring and understanding because they have emotionally abandoned themselves. They are like demanding little children. The problem is that most people dislike being pulled on and demanded of. Most people don’t want emotional responsibility for another person and will withdraw in the face of another’s complaints.

This is what my father did. He withdrew, shut down, was emotionally unavailable to my mother as a way to protect himself from being controlled by her complaints. Of course, he didn’t just do this in response to my mother. He had learned to withdraw as a child in response to his own mother’s complaints and criticism. He entered the marriage ready to withdraw in the face of my mother’s pull, while she entered the marriage ready to make my father emotionally responsible for her. A perfect match!

My father’s withdrawal, of course, only served to exacerbate my mother’s complaining, and she constantly complained about my father’s lack of caring about her. Likewise, my mother’s complaining served to exacerbate my father’s already withdrawn way of being. This vicious circle started early and continued unabated for the 60 years of their marriage, until my mother died.

While my parents loved each other, their ability to express their love got buried beneath the dysfunctional system they created. Unfortunately, this is all too common in relationships. One person pulling – with complaints, anger, judgment, and other forms of control - and the other withdrawing, is the most common relationship system I work with.

A person addicted to complaining will not be able to stop complaining until he or she does the inner work of developing an adult part of themselves capable of giving themselves the love, caring, understanding and compassion they need. As long as they believe that it is another’s responsibility to be the adult for them and fill them with love, they will not take on this responsibility for themselves.

Our inner child – the feeling part of us – needs attention, approval, caring. If we don’t learn to give this to ourselves, then this wounded child part of ourselves will either seek to get it from others, or learn to numb out with substance and process addictions – food, alcohol, drugs, TV, work, gambling, and so on. If, as a child, a person saw others get attention through complaining – as my mother did with my grandmother – and if complaining worked for the child to get what he or she wanted, then it can become an addiction. Like all addictions, it may work for the moment, but it will never fill the deep inner need for love. Only we can fill this need for ourselves, by opening our hearts to the Source of love. Only we can do the inner work of developing a loving adult capable of opening to the love of Spirit and bringing that love to the child within. People stop complaining when they learn to fill themselves with love.