Fear of Flying

The plane was bouncing hard as we were starting our decent into Albuquerque. Living in Santa Fe, I’ve flown in and out of Albuquerque airport a lot due to my workshop schedule. It’s always bumpy.

The woman sitting next to me was gripping the armrests and shaking, scared to death. I turned to her and asked her if she would like some help. She nodded.

“Don’t worry, nothing bad is going to happen. We are safe.”

“How do you know that?” she asked.

“If you were to move out of what your mind is telling you that is scaring you and open to a different Source of Truth, you would know too. Your mind, which is devoted to trying to control things, is freaking out due to feeling so out of control. It’s this feeling of being out of control that is scaring you. And, of course, you have no control over the plane or over the pilot. But if you tune into the real Source of Truth, which is definitely not your mind, you will know that we are safe. Imagine that your mind is like your personal computer, which only contains what has been programmed into it. Imagine that the Source of Truth is like the Internet – a vast network of information that you can easily access. Imagine the Source of Truth as a beautiful light filled with all the wisdom of the universe. Open to learning with this Source of Truth and ask, ‘Are we safe?’ Try it and see what happens. Just focus your whole being on wanting to know the truth.”

The women was terrified enough to try it, even though I think she thought I was crazy. She closed her eyes and focused on the question, “Are we safe?” A moment later she opened her eyes, clearly surprised.

“I heard in my mind, ‘You are safe.’ Did I just make that up?”

“How do you feel if you decide to believe it?”

“Much better! I’m not feeling so scared!”

“That’s because our emotions are an accurate guide of whether or not we are telling ourselves the truth. Our emotions are a great gift from our Source. We will always feel badly when we are telling ourselves a lie, and we will feel happy and peaceful when we are operating from Truth. You were terrified because you were telling yourself a lie, and now you are fine because you are telling yourself the truth. Whether you believe this is coming from within you or from without is not important. What is important is to know that you can access the Truth. I always ask this question BEFORE I fly, so that I know the whole time that I am safe, bumps and all.”

The woman had a big smile on her face the rest of the way down, even though we were still bouncing around.

Fear, whether of flying or of anything else, is always the result of what you are telling yourself. Your fear is letting you know that you are off base in your thinking. If you then cover up your fear with an addiction, such as drinking on the plane in order to get past the fear, then you never deal with the lie you are telling yourself that is causing the fear.

The wounded part of us always feels afraid when we think we are out of control of something. This part of us, our mind, thinks it can know the truth about things. But our minds are programmed with many false beliefs that cause much fear. Truth is not something we can access from our limited mind – it is something we have to open to. The thoughts of our mind will never make us feel safe and will certainly not give us the control we seek. True safety lies in opening to Spirit and being guided by Truth. The paradox is that in releasing control to Spirit, we gain the sense of control that comes from operating out of the Truth.

The mind thinks it can create safety with some form of control. Yet true safety comes from being connected with the Source of Truth.

Falsch einschlafen

Viele Menschen kriegen einfach kein Auge zu, und das trotz der Müdigkeit. Sie liegen Stunde für Stunde im Bett und warten auf das Einschlafen, das meist erst nur sehr spät kommt. Am morgen steht man nach so einer Nacht ohne Energie, ermüdet und schlapp auf.


Viele schlaflose Menschen greifen sofort zu Medikamente und versuchen auf diesen Weg ihren Schlaf nachzuhelfen. Das muss aber nicht sein, es gibt viele Hausrezepte, die auf natürlicher Weise dem Schlaf unterstützen.


Hier ein paar Tipps, wie man besser Einschlafen kann, ohne Medikamente nehmen zu müssen. Oftmals schlafen Menschen nicht ein, da sie sich falsch zu ihrem Körper verhalten. Manchmal hilft eine kleine Verhaltensänderung, um besser einschlafen zu können.


Hier ein paar Tipps, wie man besser Einschlafen kann, ohne Medikamente nehmen zu müssen. Oftmals schlafen Menschen nicht ein, da sie sich falsch zu ihrem Körper verhalten. Manchmal hilft eine kleine Verhaltensänderung, um besser einschlafen zu können.


Hier ein paar Tipps, wie man besser Einschlafen kann, ohne Medikamente nehmen zu müssen. Oftmals schlafen Menschen nicht ein, da sie sich falsch zu ihrem Körper verhalten. Manchmal hilft eine kleine Verhaltensänderung, um besser einschlafen zu können.


Wohlfühlrituale entwickeln
Man muss sich wohlfühlen vor dem Schlafen gehen! Also keine schlechte Gedanken und Sorgen beiseite legen. Vor dem Schlafen seinem Körper etwas Gutes tun. Wie wäre es mit einer entspannenden Dusche oder sogar Bad mit beruhigendem Öle. Oder sich einfach gut eincremen. Den Körper ein bisschen verwöhnen, damit auch die Seele etwas davon hat.


Richtig gemütliches Bett
Ein jeder Mensch müsste sein Schlafzimmer, sein Bett genießen und lieben.
Zum Wohlfühlen gehört nun mal auch ein geeignetes Bett, gemütliche Kissen und eine kuscheligen Decke. Bei wem dies jedoch nicht der Fall ist, muss schnell etwas bei sich im Schlafzimmer ändern.


Frisch gelüftet
Ein frisch gelegtes Bett oder frisch gelüftete Bett ist das beste Gefühl, das man beim Einschlafen haben kann. Der Geruch und das Gefühl der Sauberkeit sind einmalig. Für manche sein ein frisch gelüftetes Bett zu kühl zu erscheinen, doch da irr er sich!


Bewegung macht müde
Wer sich nicht genug bewegt, wird schwerer Müdigkeit empfinden. Der Körper wurde einfach nicht ausgepowert und empfindet noch eine Menge Energie in sich. Wie wär's mit einem Spaziergang vor dem Schlafen gehen, oder gar eine Runde Joggen? Oder einfach von der Arbeit ein paar U Bahn Stationen laufen anstatt fahren. Wer sein Körper auspowert, wird so müde sein, dass das Einschlafen kein Thema mehr sein wird.


Raus aus der Gedankenspirale
Was mache ich morgen, was koche ich morgen, was muss ich noch bei der arbeit erledigen, warum hat die Nachbarin nicht hallo gesagt? Fragen und Gedanken können manchmal den Kopf schlechte Streiche spielen. Wer viel zu viel vor dem Einschlafen nachdenkt, wird leider nicht abschalten können und so schlecht einschlafen. Einfach Gedanken wechseln, ein film schauen oder ein Buch lesen und Gedanken beruhigen.

Expressing Your Love Through Service

A client of mine told me that she had been making food for a friend of hers who was very ill. “I find that my heart opens and I feel so happy when I am doing something for someone else. I need to do this more, but I don’t know what to do.”

Doing service is a powerful way to open the heart and fulfill the soul. Those people who do service know how much joy they receive from giving to others. The more inner work we do to fill ourselves with love, the more our heart overflows to the point where we may feel compelled to help others.

There are many forms of service and we each need to find the way that works best for us. There is no right way. We can serve by helping one person, such as being a Big Brother or Big Sister to a disadvantaged child, or we can be of service by helping whole groups, such as raising funds for environmental projects. We can offer our time building houses for the poor, or we can offer money. We can choose to be of service to people, animals or Mother Earth. Your service may be in being a loving parent to your children, helping a friend in need or being a loving mate who supports the other’s highest good in many little ways.

Doing service is a matter of discovering your passion and then offering your time and love. You might have a special interest in protecting the environment, stopping child abuse, helping the homeless or caring for the dying. You might offer service through your creativity, creating beautiful drawings, ceramics or quilts to donate to charitable causes or give as gifts. Tuning in to your feelings of what brings you joy will lead you toward knowing how you want to be of service to others.

Steve discovered his passion for helping the elderly when his father became ill and was in a convalescent home. A hard-driving businessman, Steve was surprised to find how joyous and fulfilled he felt when he visited his father and brought his humor and compassion to the other elderly at the home. Being with the elderly was so satisfying, Steve decided to cut back on his work and spend more time at the home. He had discovered what makes his heart sing.

Toni had always loved animals. One day she discovered that there was a wonderful animal sanctuary not far from her, a place that took in animals no one else wanted. Toni started to volunteer there and found that it brought her great joy to help maintain this loving sanctuary.

Work, too, can be service. When you experience your work as helping people and you love doing it, it is service, whether you are a hairdresser, a teacher, a physician, an auto mechanic, a therapist, an attorney or a bus driver. While you get paid for your time, no one can pay you for the love you put into it. Love is always a gift that comes through you.

In fact, anything you offer that expresses your love is service - your time, creativity, encouragement or a warm and caring smile to a hassled store clerk. Service is not only expressed in specific works but also in your intention in each and every moment. Have you ever smiled at a stranger or offered a compliment just because you noticed something in him or her that caught your eye? When was the last time you said how much you appreciate someone? When your heart is open to others, service can be a way of life.

The practice of service does not have to be done only on an individual level. It is possible for whole families to participate in service projects. Rather than relaxing around the house and watching TV together, you can participate in a local environmental or social project. Families who do service together generally maintain a higher level of values and unity than those who do not create the time for such activities.

Each of us needs to find the service that excites us, enlivens us and fills our heart with joy as we express God’s love through our actions. Giving for the pure joy of giving feeds the soul. We love God by loving the children of God and serving them in any way we can. It is through service that we can truly grow spiritually. Through service, we are confronted with our issues and given the opportunity to practice our lovingness and expand beyond what we think our limits are.

Exploring Mechanisms You Developed to Survive Your Family - Mimicry

Mimicking

When you were a child you probably remember swearing to the universe that when you grew up you’d never, ever treat your children the way your parents treated you. You’d be different; you’d be better. You knew it from the core of your being. Right? So how is it that instead of making your vow come true, all these years later you’ve ended up copying their very qualities that you most despised? Welcome to the world of mimicking—the third mechanism (accommodation and rebellion being the other two)
we sometimes use that’s influenced by guilt toward your parents and siblings.
Why do we use “mimicking”? What are the reasons behind this behavior? Remember the warning “I hope your children do to you what you’ve done to me”? You were blamed for your parents’ suffering, and they wanted you to suffer the same way at the hands of your children. And so you do. Four reasons explain why.

MIMICKING: PUNISHMENT AND RELIEF

We become like our parents to punish ourselves and relieve our guilt for hurting them. If you think you’re responsible for causing your parents’ unhappiness, suffering, disappointment, getting out of control, then you deserve to be punished by having the same faults. Huh? Think of it like this, if you are unhappy, suffer, are disappointed, or out of control, then you have paid yourself back for the suffering you caused them. Think of the biblical expression, “an eye for an eye.” This requires that a punishment fit the crime exactly. It turns out that your conscience operates the same way. It requires that you be punished exactly in the way you’ve made another person suffer; in this case, your parents or sibling.
When your overprotective parent became frantic with worry when you played sports, you felt responsible for causing their worry. They screamed with anxiety, “You’ll break your leg! You’ll get killed!” And how does your conscience operate? It requires your becoming frantic with worry when your kids are playing, just as your parents did with you. There. Now you’ve been punished for your long-ago offense of causing your parents to feel frantic with worry over you.
Remember the indigenous tribe described in Chapter 1? Remember how they blamed themselves for earthquakes, floods, volcanic eruptions, and so on? A child blames him- or herself when a parent continually acts badly. Later on in life, being like that parent keeps the grown child from feeling better off than the parent. This is how our conscience evens the score.
If you blame yourself for the explosive rages your domineering, overbearing father suffered when you didn’t submit to him, you’d assume that your independent attitude was responsible. You could do penance for your guilt toward him by becoming domineering with others and explosive with your own children. Why is this “penance”? Because by mimicking your father, you also suffer when your children act independently of you.
Does this sound self-destructive? It is. Surely, you’d prefer to not fly off the handle and rail at your children. And just as surely you’d rather not suffer when they don’t submit to you. But the idea is that if you caused your parents or siblings to suffer, you deserve to suffer in the same way. It’s precisely this idea, the dynamic of self-blame, that’s central to why we behave in ways that we hate.
That explains the first of the four reasons why we choose to suffer through mimicking our parents’ behavior. Let’s look at the second reason.

MIMICKING: DON’T FEEL BAD—WE’RE IN THIS TOGETHER

If you’ve ever felt bad because you think it’s not fair to be better off than your parents, you might resort to mimicking to relieve your bad feelings. At a talk I gave, a woman told me about her experience with her obese mother. She remembered not only sitting with her during meals and snacks, but she also recalled mimicking her mother’s overeating because she thought that would comfort her mother. Her exact words were, “I felt she would feel comforted because we were in it together.” What was she really saying? “Don’t feel bad, Mom, I have the same [overeating] problem that you have.”
That’s the second reason for mimicking behaviors we hate, what’s the third?

MIMICKING: PUSHING AWAY THE PAIN

For the most part, we all want to forget our unpleasant experiences of the past and have the bad feelings associated with them fade away. This done, we can enjoy our present-day lives. Now factor this in: By mistreating others the way we’ve been mistreated, we help forget that we suffered at the hands of our parents. How does that help, you’re probably wondering?
Imagine you’ve gone through something terrible like childhood abuse. (The victim could have been you or perhaps someone else in the family.) The result is that you can’t stand thinking about it, that you want to bury the memory and never reexperience the pain of it again. The farther removed from it you get, in physical distance and in time, the safer you feel and the less likely you are to think about it. What helps you accomplish this? Being as far removed as possible from your memories of the traumatic experience. What could be farther away from that opposite position? To become the one who mistreats, not the one is mistreated.
If as an adult you act possessively toward your children, you demand underlying loyalty and overt demonstrations of love the way your parents did with you, it’ll help you forget the pain you felt when your parent was that way with you. What pain? Maybe out of loyalty to your possessive parent, you inhibited your relationships with others. Or maybe you cut off new relationships because you feared being trapped by the demands of loyalty you felt all relationships came with. Either way, you suffer. And now, as an adult, if you dominate your children, maybe you’ll forget that you yourself submitted to your own domineering parents. You don’t want to recall painful memories of having been cheated out of your own independence.
With three reasons for mimicking looked at and understood, we’re left with one more. Here’s how that one shapes our world of self-blame.

MIMICKING: WORKING HARD TO IMPROVE THE FLAW

By doing to others what was done to you, you hope to meet people who can show you how to better cope with the behavior that harmed you. That’s the basic premise, and it’s a lot to take in so let’s look at it from another angle. These new people you meet become role models for you in learning new ways of dealing with behavior that was painful or difficult for you in the past. If you think about couples you know, you’ll find that this is often true. And if you’ve ever wondered why many couples have extreme opposite personalities that often clash, you now have the answer to all your wondering. A submissive person, who gives in easily, is with a domineering partner who tends not to. Why? Each one is actually learning from the other how to improve on his or her own shortcoming.
These four reasons are why, in spite of your best intentions, you may have acquired those qualities of your parents that you hated the most. In the case of David, a smart businessman who undermined his career success, you’ll see that he did this because of his father and because he identified with some of his father’s qualities.

Europe: Places to Meet Pure Bred Aristocracy and Royalty

Want to meet a Duke or a true Prince and Princess? One of the easiest and most convenient places to meet pure royalty is at one of the prestigious hotel casinos. They hang out at many of the following five casinos and, once you are in, you can interact with them, play against them and if you are good enough, even beat them. Wouldn't you like to boast that you defeated a King? These five hotel casinos give you that chance.

But do not expect an all you can eat buffet or players with baseball caps and cool shades. Come dressed elegantly and only then will you be let in to share a baccarat game with pure-bred European aristocracy.

The European casinos listed here are the largest and the most luxurious casinos in Europe. Their appointed clientele is less the seasonal tourist gambler and more the upper crust. So, if you are looking for a stylish way to spend your latest lottery winning, you can shoot the dice in one of the casinos listed below while your traveling partners lie around the French Riviera beaches or go on wild shopping trips in the streets of London or Moscow.

1) Casino de Monte Carlo, Monaco:
Monte Carlo has been the favorite gaming destination of Europe's rich and famous for almost 150 years with the first casino that was founded by Prince Charles III of Monaco in 1863. Casino de Monte Carlo is a complex of five posh casinos located by the seashore and decorated in French rococo style with marbled columns, golden ornaments and crystal chandeliers. The overall environment would make you feel like an extra in a French history movie.

2) Casino Metropol, Moscow:
The Russian Federation has the biggest number of casinos and slot machines in Eastern Europe. The best casinos for tourists are obviously the ones located in hotels. Casino Metropol is part of the five star Hotel Metropol, which is not only one of the most elegant casino hotels in the area but it is also conveniently located in the center of Moscow within a walking distance from the Red Square and the Kremlin. The lowest minimum table requirement is 25 dollars and a night at the presidential suite will cost you 2,000 dollars.

3) Baden Baden Casino, Baden Baden, Germany:
The veteran European casino was founded in 1809 and although it has changed several ownerships since then, its reputation as one of the finest casinos in Europe in general and in Germany in particular has not change. Nowadays, the Baden Baden Casino is one of the city's landmarks along with the famous thermal baths. If you ignore the table games and the slot machines, walking through the 32,289 square foot casino looks as similar to a visit in an European art museum with permanent exhibits of oil paintings and sculptures.

4) The Clermont Club, London, England:
If you are visiting the UK, you cannot just pop into a casino but have to apply for a membership at least a day ahead. If you plan to follow this procedure, the Clermont Club in Berkeley Square is one of the most reputable gaming clubs around. Set in a 17th century building, the Clermont Club was designed to resemble the Great Hall at Holkham. In addition to its friendly and convenient gaming room, the Clermont Club includes a bar and a clubroom where members and their guests can lounge over a banquet of a vintage bottle of champagne. Note that playing at online casinos is legal in the UK, so you can just pop into any internet cafe for online games.

5) Casino Barriere de Deauville, Deauville, France:
The elegant seaside casino resort had inspired Ian Fleming in depicting the Casino of Royale les Eaux in his first James Bond novel Casino Royale. First founded in the 1860s by the Duc de Morny, the extravagant palace is one of the most beautiful casinos in the world. In addition to its gaming facilities, Casino Barriere hosts variety of exclusive entertainment shows as well as cultural and artistic events.

Estudiar y Trabajar en el Extranjero

Superarse y vivir en otro país es uno de los sueños de muchas personas. Como ya lo hacen muchas compañías, promueven el vivir, trabajar y estudiar en otros países. Para muchas personas este es el sueño americano y para otras simplemente salir de su país e ir a vivir a otro lugar del mundo.

Muchas de las veces en que las personas tienen este sueño siempre lo creen tan imposible como ganar en Casinos en Línea y además porque se necesita de muchas cosas para poder viajar y vivir en otro país. Empezando por la visa, el idioma, la plata y otros factores que influyen en esta decisión.

Ahora ya existen esta clase de oportunidades, estás las ofrecen diferentes países y entidades del mundo. Si bien así, ser judío también permite que muchas personas del mundo que pertenecen a la religión judía, tengan la oportunidad de vivir en Israel por el tiempo que ellos quieran, esta es una forma de apoyo por parte de la religión a aquellas personas que deseen viajar, estudiar en Israel y hasta quedarse para toda la vida.

Hoy en día no resulta tan difícil ir a vivir a otro país, ahora los estudiantes cuentan con visas de estudiantes y hay otros que cuentan con visa de trabajo. Lo único que se debe hacer es tener ganas de estudiar y trabajar en otro lugar ya que para todas las personas no es fácil alejarse de su familia y de su vida diaria en su país.

Una de las mejores oportunidades ahora es ir a estudiar a Australia, en la mayoría de países como EE.UU. es difícil tramitar una visa, en Inglaterra la vida es muy costosa, en Canadá es difícil conseguir la visa de trabajo, pero en Australia no ponen tanto problema, hasta la visa dura muy poco tiempo para tramitarla y tiene un 96% de probabilidades de ser otorgada.\

Por esta razón la cifra de emigrantes a Australia ha aumentado considerablemente viendo que éste país esta dispuesto a ayudar a los estudiantes de otros países que desean superarse.

Por supuesto hay algunos prerrequisitos para poder estudiar en Australia: el estudiante debe haberse graduado de alguna carrera universitaria, tener el nivel de inglés requerido, presentar un examen de conocimientos acerca del país Australia y además tener un perfil profesional que este acorde con la demanda exigida en Australia.

Es por eso que es muy importante que los estudiantes hagan un curso de ingles al mismo tiempo que cursan su carrera en su país ya que al final de los estudios y con una segunda lengua, tendrán la oportunidad de estudiar y trabajar en otro país o por lo menos encontrar un mejor trabajo en el país que residen.

Resulta muy difícil pensar en todos los trámites que hay que hacer para poder adquirir una visa y trabajar en otro país pero en verdad es cuestión de organización y ganas de superarse, lo que en realidad no toma mucho tiempo y los esfuerzos que se hagan se verán reflejados para toda la vida.

Es hora de sentarse y pensar en lo que realmente los estudiantes quieren hacer y si en verdad quieren viajar a otro país, conocer otra cultura y si quieren, quedarse a vivir en otro país y empezar su vida allá. Mucha suerte en todos los tramites y ojalá aprovechen esta gran oportunidad.

Entrepreneurship - the Failure Myth

A life spent making mistakes is not only more honourable, but more useful, than a life spent doing nothing.
George Bernard Shaw

According to Global Entrepreneurial Monitor (GEM) fear of failure is the top reason given in Ireland and worldwide by aspiring entrepreneurs for not starting their own businesses.

NESTA - the National Endowment for Science, Technology and the Arts and the UK’s largest early stage investor in innovative and creative businesses – found that almost three quarters of people who said they had what they believed was a good business idea were not acting on it because they were afraid of not succeeding.

Ironically on further examination it is obvious that all would-be entrepreneurs are being paralyzed by something that doesn’t exist.
That’s right. Failure is a myth!

Entrepreneurial Development – Failure brings you Closer to Success!

Thomas Edison, inventor of the light bulb famously said “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”

It took James Dyson, the engineer who reinvented the vacuum cleaner, four and a half years and 5,127 prototypes to refine his design.

“Each failure taught me so much,” he said. “Success teaches you nothing. Failures teach you everything. Making mistakes is the most important thing you can do.”

In an interview with Time Magazine, Larry Page, inventor of Google, said, “Invariably we try ten things that don’t quite work out in order to do one thing that is successful. And we learn a lot in doing the ten things that didn’t quite work.”

Thus every failure brings you a step closer to success and moves you further down the path of entrepreneurship.

Ironically by embracing this truism you mastered your first two major challenges in life – walking and talking.

Remember: As a child, ‘Never say die’, ‘Have no fear’, ‘Try and try again’, ‘Enjoy the moment’, were your working metaphors.

You fixed your eye on the goal, took your first step – wobbled a bit – steadied yourself. Then another step. Then landed on your backside!

What happens then? Did you give up? Did you say to yourself ‘I tried my best and I can’t do it. It hurts. I’m never doing that again!’? Did your ego kick in and start whispering ‘you’re making a fool of yourself. They’re all laughing at you! Better quit while you are ahead.’?

No indeed, as each one of us is born with an innate desire to reach our full potential, so you got up and tried again ultimately succeeding.

Model off your childlike strategies in the future and master the art of entrepreneurship.

About Kevin Kelly

Described as the "coach behind Ireland's Celtic Tiger," Kevin Kelly is one of Europe's and Asia’s leading authorities on motivation, entrepreneurship, leadership, communication, and personal excellence.

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